3B June 2016 Review

Let's hope I'm more timely with this month's review than last month, eh?

For those who don't know. 3B is a monthly beauty subscription. For $12, you'll get 4-5 sample (sometimes full) sized Asian beauty products. It's a nice way to dip your toe into the Asian beauty market! Check them out here: 3B

As always, I pay for this service with my own money and all opinions are my honest ones.

I, unfortunately, haven't had a chance to try any of this stuff yet so I'll just basically be listing everything I got and hopefully can describe them all well enough! Also I don't know the Cruelty Free status of these brands except It's Skin.

Purpletale 5 Steps to Lovely Skin: (the flat package on the bottom) I'm rather keen to try this one out. It's got everything you need for your cleansing/moisturizing routine: cleanser, ampoule, sheet mask, facial cream, and neck cream. This is a full size and goes for $8.

Milky Dress Premium Brightener: I'm going to guess that this might be one of those products that could also be considered an illuminizer. While providing up to 10 hours of hydration, it can be used as a primer under your foundation or BB cream to give you a glowy look. These kinds of things just accentuate the texture in my skin (i.e. pores the size of New Hampshire) but I'll give it a shot. I have no idea how much are in these little packets but the full size (100g) is about $16.

Mirai Clinical Body Spritzer: AH! I lied. I have tried this. It's basically a scented body mist for when you're feeling...less than fresh. As in you're sweating balls in 95 degree heat and want to cover up your stank. It's a nice clean smelling mist - it's got Japanese persimmon extract, apparently. This is full size and costs $14.

Skinfood Black Sugar Serum (Light): Uh oh. It's a serum. I have notoriously bad luck with Asian skin care serums. This is made with black sugar and Cheongju, a traditional Korean wine. Interesting...I do like the Skinfood brand so I'll have to try it! Full size is 120ml. I have no idea how small this is so let's cut it to 1/3 the size and give it an $8 value.

It's Skin Todak Todak Pack Nutrition: Look at that little package? Isn't it cute?? (something NEVER to say to a man, btw). Seems like it's a regular wash off mask and this one is for moisturizing and cooling. Full size and it costs around $4.50 (CF)

With the products I can get the values on, this box is worth around $30. Add a few more in for the Milky Dress stuff and that ain't too bad!

Petit Vour June 2016

This is the final box in my 3-month trial period. I have to say I am SOOPER tempted to sign up for 6 months or a full year. I'm still processing so we'll just have to see. 

For those who may not know, Petit Vour is a monthly subscription service. For $15 a month, you get 4 sample/full sized beauty products that are all cruelty free (toxic free, vegan, etc.). Check them out here: PETIT VOUR

I purchased these boxes with my own money and all opinions are my honest ones.

This time it's Mermaids! Yay! Actually, the theme is Summer Escape but same difference. I've only tried the lip products so far but I'm excited about (almost) everything.

Juice Beauty Green Apple Moisturizer: I got something else from JB last month and it's been very nice to my face. So I imagine this moisturizer will be just as good. I like my face lotion to have SPF so I'm eager to try it. Full size is $38 so this trial version is worth $18.

EVOLVh Leave In Conditioner: Not excited for this. I've tried a couple leave in conditioners before and since my hair is very fine, things like this tend to weigh it down and I look like a grease ball. If anyone thinks they might like this, hit me up and I'll hand it over! This is a travel size and costs $11. (full is $26)

Suntegrity Lip CPR: Oh dear gods these lip stick samples are divine! You'd never know there was SPF 30 in them. SPF in lip products are extremely drying for me and these are moisturizing and very comfortable. They have a little shimmer/shine to them, too. I swatched them on my lips and my hand because lip sticks/glosses look very different on your hand than on your lips. Just wanted to give you an idea so don't judge a lipstick by its swatch! The little pots are $5 (full size is $28).

Precious Skin Elixirs Exfoliating Clay: This is a dry powder and you mix it with water right before you need it. You can either just use it as an exfoliator or apply a thick layer like a mask, let it dry, then rinse off. Full size is $70 (holy balls) so this sample is $4.50.

I'm pretty happy with this month's box. $38.50 is a good deal. Obviously if I sign back up, I'll review the boxes here!

Universal Yums June 2016 Review

Have I ever told you guys how much I love food? I'm not a food snob. I just like to eat a lot. So this subscription service is perfection. Universal Yums is a monthly subscription. For $13 (or $25) each month you will receive snacks/candy from a different country. Check them out here: UY

This month's goodies come from the good old US of A!

Trivia: According to the World Giving Index, Americans are the most likely people in the world to: A.Get arrested for jaywalking; B.Help a stranger; C.Walk by a homeless person without giving money; D.Drop their gum on the sidewalk. (Answer at the bottom of the post)

I love the tissue paper! I've tasted most things in the box already so let's do this!

Route 11 Chesapeake Crab Chips: Not sure how much like crab these taste so much as Old Bay Seasoning. Pretty bitter and kind of gross. The dog likes them though. 

Abba Zaba Peanut Butter Taffy: This stuff feels pretty hard so I will not be eating it. I don't think I've ever had this before though I've seen it everywhere. 

Black & White Cookie: The hubby expressed GREAT interest in this so I'm chaining myself to the front porch column to keep from eating it. It looks really really REALLY good though

Aplets and Cotlets: Basically these are little gems of apple and apricot Turkish delight. I thought there were separate apple and apricot flavors but they're all mixed together and they were awesome. Jelly like the TD but with walnuts. 

Montana Wild Huckleberry Twists: These are great little candies. Fantastic flavor, like blueberries on crack. 

Vermont Maple Drops: Though I LOATHE real maple syrup, I'm still excited to try these out. Maple candy is usually better than maple syrup anyway. UPDATE: I've tasted one. Tastes like real maple syrup. *sad trombone*

Lammes Habanero Pecan Praline: I was introduced to the gorgeous praline in Nashville (I think) so I was intrigued by the spicy aspect of this one. UNTIL I TRIED IT. I barely had a pea sized bite - more like 1/2 pea - and my mouth burned for 5 full minutes. FUCK THAT SHIT. Nooooope.

Fralingers' Salt Water Taffy: I love salt water taffy and have since I was a kid. These have a tendency to get stale pretty fast but before that, they safe for my crowns! I've had two so far (lime and another flavor I couldn't quite place). Awesome.

Grippos Bar-B-Q Potato Chips: BONUS ITEM! Apparently you can't get these many places outside Ohio (Cincinnati in particular) so I'm happy they included them. Nice spice and mostly sweet. Which is my perfect bbq combo! 

Very good score this month! The clue for next month could be Hong Kong or maybe Taiwan. It's Asian so who cares? It'll be awesome!

(TRIVIA ANSWER: B. Help a stranger)

Ipsy June 2016 Review

For those who may not know, Ipsy is a monthly subscription service. For $10 each month you get a reusable cosmetics bag with 4-5 sample (sometimes full) sized beauty products. Check them out here: IPSY

As always, I purchase this service with my own money and all opinions are my honest ones.

The theme this month is Rebel Rebel. While the bag is kind of adorable (because THAT is what we want our rebels to be, amirite?), the theme as usual is completely useless. But let's get into these products, shall we?

Crown Brush 3-Tone Bronzer: (top picture) I never knew Crown made makeup. Maybe it's a new venture. Maybe I'm just late to the party. This little trio holds highlight, blush, and bronzer. Use each individually or swirl your brush through all three (top to bottom: highlight, blush, bronzer, all three mixed together). Unless you're the size of a pixie or have no issue putting on blush or bronzer with a q-tip, I suggest you mix all three together to create a nice pink/peach toned shiny blush. None of the colors are all that pigmented on their own but they are very pretty. The normal trio product (.78 ounces) goes for $20 on their site so this .4 ounce sample is probably worth $10. (CF) - UPDATE: I have used this as a blush and it's sooo pretty!

Urban Decay Fireball Eye shadow: (middle and bottom pics) I needed two pictures for this little eye shadow because it's one of those duo-chrome beauties. It's pink - no, wait, it's kind of peach. Hang on, it's both! I don't think the pictures are doing it justice but trust me, she's gorgeous. Full size is $19 for 1.5g. This .2g sample is around $2.50 (CF)

Frank Body Original Coffee Scrub: (top pic) This is a new one for me. Australian born, this is a brand that has created a line of coffee-based skin care. It's only available on-line. I'm excited to try it, though I just discovered a great coffee scrub from a US company so Frank's got some work cut out for him. The tone of the descriptions (on the bag and on-line) is a bit childish but I am amused. And slightly aroused...Full size bag is 7 ounces ($14.95) so this 1.7 ounce sample should run around $3.50. (I'm guessing it's a CF brand because of its vegan claims)

Formula X nail polish: I think I've heard of this company before but I don't really care about nail polish THAT much so I don't keep tabs on these things. However, this is a gorgeous bright tomato red color (called Wingwoman - #sorrynotsorry to you feminists out there but that makes my eyes roll VERY LOUDLY). It's supposed to last on your nails, chip free, for 8 days. Challenge accepted! Full size is $10.50 so this 4ml sample is about $2.50. (CF)

Be a Bombshell Pout Potion: I've had BaB cosmetics before in Ipsy. Most of the time I think I like them. But I have to say this lip gloss/creme is awesome! It's not heavy or sticky, smells like coconut (but not too strong so you won't smell it for long), and the color, called Secret, is beautiful. It's a soft pink nude that's just a shade lighter than my natural lip color. Not sure if it lasts more than a couple of hours (I didn't eat anything but I did kiss the hubby twice) or is streaky - perhaps a darker color would be easier to notice - but I loved it. Not sure if this is a sample or full - it looks just like the one on BaB's website. So let's give them the benefit of the doubt and call is full at $14 value. (CF)

Over all I think this bag is about $32. Not too bad considering I'm happy about every product in here!

3B May 2016 Review

Holy crap this one snuck up on me. I didn't even realize I forgot to write up a review until I went to clean out the pics on my phone. Whooops.

Anyhoo...3B is a monthly subscription service. For $12 a month you will receive 4-5 sample (some full) sized Asian beauty products. Check them out here: 3B BEAUTY

As always, I purchase this service with my own money and all opinions are my honest ones. 

Leaders Brightening Recovery Mask: This one was different because it was more of a gel saturation instead of liquid/serum. Nice and NOT drippy. I think I'd have to use this more than once to see if it lightened up any acne scars or what not but for a one time use, it was really really nice. This is a little more on the expensive side for sheet masks but I have a feeling over time it's worth the investment. $7

Sulwhasoo Essential Firming Cream: I have not used these packets yet so I can't deny or confirm any claims. Supposed to firm, tone, and stimulate collagen production. Can be used in the morning or evening. This isn't even sold at the Sulwhasoo site but you can find it at Nordstrom's or Ebay. Not really a good sign if you ask me. $95 for 2.5 ounces so I suppose these little packets are maybe $9.

Skinfood Royal Honey Propolis Essence: I have a sneaking suspicion that this stuff broke me out. I like the consistency of it and the smell is very soft. But again, like with most Korean serums, they just don't like me. 50mls goes for $24. I have no idea how much is in this sample.

Dewytree Blackhead Out Nose Patch: I don't have the problem of blackheads but I know these little sticky patches can still clean out gunk from the pores. They're easy to use and kind of fun, actually. One package gets you 10 strips for $12 so these three will run about $3-$4.

Aritaum Fresh Power Essence Pouch Sleeping Pack: Never used one of these sleeping packs before. If you haven't either, basically you spread this stuff all over your face and then go to bed. Rinse off in the morning. You can put your moisturizer on before this, if you want (I asked). I did that and I think that's what caused a huge zit to form just under my lip. I want to try it again without that step and see what happens. Surprisingly, my pillow did not get all goopy. A little hard to find but the item on Amazon goes for about $5 (and this is full size).

Since I don't know how much the propolis essence is, I'll give this bag about $30-$35 worth. Not bad. I don't hate it but since their skin care can fuck me up, I'm not in love with it either. Until next month! Assuming I remember...

Petit Vour May 2016

I'm now in the second month of a three-month trial on this box. It's a monthly beauty subscription that carries only cruelty free/vegan products. For $15 each month you get 4 sample or full sized items. Check them out here: PETIT VOUR

(Note: I have purchased this trial with my own money and all opinions are my honest ones)

I love the little card that comes with this box. Not just because it's got all the relevant info on the back (glares over at Ipsy) but the front has a pretty design and a big "Thanks" from PV to its subscribers. Apparently they're celebrating three years of being in business!

Ecco Bella gloss: Gorgeous color. Because it's a gloss it's a nice sheer wash of berry. It's not sticky or heavy. It's actually perfect. I highly recommend a lip liner, though! If it were more opaque I guess people would consider this a great fall color. Personally, wear whatever fucking color you want in any fucking season. This gloss seems like it would be great any time of year, no matter the color. It's full size and runs $20.

Bedrock and Bloom Smart Ash: Just a WEEEEE bit disappointed that in my second box I got another sample of this stuff (check out my April PF post to see what this stuff is all about - with an awesome visual). It's a cool product and really different. But I just used up my original sample and don't really want to start another one. If anyone wants it, let me know. Sample costs $3 (full size if $30).

Captain Blankenship sea salt hair spray: I don't normally use this kind of spray even when I had long hair. But the card says you can spray in on damp hair, braid, then sleep on it for nice waves in the morning. I don't need to spray anything to get that effect but what the hell. I'll give it a shot. It does smell REALLY good. Full size is $24 so this sample is $7 (NOTE: Any time I see the name Blankenship, all I can think of is MXC - anyone else? Anyone??)

Juice Beauty peel, blemish clearing: I believe the peel in this product is chemical (as opposed to peeling off a giant sheet of dried product in the shape of your face). JB is in A LOT of subscription services but I don't think I've ever gotten anything before. It smells kinda weird (like the plastic container) but I'll still try it out. $5 sample size (full is $39).

Over all the value of this box is $35 (that's what he said - ugh, I hate myself for making that joke). Aside from the repeat offender, I'm still liking the service!

Universal Yums May 2016 Box

In case you don't know, Universal Yums is a food subscription box. For $13 or $25 a month, you'll get a bunch of snacks and candy from a different county. How cool is that? Check them out here: UNIVERSAL YUMS.

Trivia: Contrary to popular belief, which of the following ISN'T typically eaten in Greece?   A.Feta Cheese; B.Greek yogurt; C.Hummus; D. Pita  (answer at the bottom of the post)

Mikio Sun-Dried Tomato & Olive Bread sticks: At first these crunchy bread sticks tasted just like sun dried tomatoes. Not my favorite but not terrible. But the olive finish (or perhaps too much oregano) was pretty bad. Neither the hubs nor I cared for these. Even Dozer was a little suspicious of them.

Serenata Chocolate Croissant: WHERE HAS THIS BEEN ALL MY LIFE?!?!?! This was a good sized croissant, soft and buttery, filled with what I can only describe as chocolate pudding heaven. I ate half when we got the box and the rest the next day with some coffee. In fact, the wrapper in the picture is already empty. OH PLEASE tell me the UY folks are working on their storefront right now!!

Rose Mex Pastilles: I've recently discovered how much I like the flavor of rose candy. Unfortunately, these rose gum drops taste like anise and cloves. Clove is a favorite of mine but not in these. Ick.

Ion Assorted Chocolates: We got 2 hazelnut (which were technically from the Ion Noisetta line), amaretto, and nougat. The hazelnuts were great, amaretto even better, but the nougat was too sugary and didn't taste like much of anything. The chocolate tasted a little like Hershey's but better. Smoother, richer flavor.

Ouzo candies: Let's get liquored up! Actually I don't think there's any booze in these hard candies but they did taste really great. Not too over the top anise flavor. Nice and sweet.

Serenata Chocolate Wafers: Think a Kit Kat on crack. Crispy wafer covered in smooth chocolate. This is from the same company that made that chocolate croissant so you know it's good.

BONUS ITEM: Saffron Herbal Tea. What a pleasant surprise! I do like tea so I was excited for this. Not sure I taste the saffron, or the lemon grass, but there's a nice soft flavor of mint that was very nice. 

This was a very good box - that croissant alone was worth it! The clue to next month pretty much tells us it'll be the good ol' US of A!! USA! USA!

TRIVIA ANSWER: C. Hummus

Ipsy May 2016 Review

For those who may not know, Ipsy is a monthly beauty subscription service. For $10, you will receive 4-5 sample (sometimes full) sized items to try. It's a great way to try new things without committing to the full price tag. Check them out here: IPSY

As usual, I pay for this service myself and all opinions are my honest ones. CF or NCF denote Cruelty Free or Not Cruelty Free. A ? means I got no fucking idea.

I don't remember what the theme is because the card that comes with this bag went right in the trash. Honestly, there's no useful info on it so it's only a waste of paper. I really wish Ipsy would join the rest of the subscription community and put the items/info/prices on the fucking card.

I really like the bag this month. It looks like an envelope, with a fold over snap front. Like a clutch purse. Cute print, too, with silhouettes of worldly landmarks - oh, yeah, the theme was travel or something like that. Whatever.

Soo-Ae Face Masks (?): I loooove face masks. I'm glad they included 3 in here because you only get one use per mask. I've already tried the Firming/Elasticity one. I don't know if it firmed anything but DAYUM my skin looked nice afterwards! The mask itself is super soft and the eye/nose/mouth holes are perfect. A little big so as to accommodate any face/feature shape. I think this has become my new favorite mask brand. You can get these at Target (which is awesome) for $15 for a 5-pack so $3 a piece is pretty good!

Pacifica Eyeshadow Trio (CF): I remember getting a Pacifica eye shadow a long time ago in an Ipsy bag but I broke it when I depotted it. It was waaay too soft. I imagine these would be the same. Gorgeous colors and they lasted on my eyes all day, without primer! But, as you'll see in the pic below, these are extremely similar to the City Color trio I got a few months ago - though that one is a lot warmer than the Pacifica shadows.. Why can't they switch things up and put in less neutral stuff? Oh well. I liked both trios and will use them! This particular color trio was designed specifically for Ipsy but their regular trio shadows (.1 ounce) go for $12. This .07 ounce is probably $9-$10.

Smashbox X-Rated Mascara (NCF): The last Smashbox sample I got was AWESOME. So I look forward to trying this one out. It claims to be the most buildable mascara - meaning you can layer it up and it won't look like shit. Full sized goes for $22 so this .10 fluid ounce sample is about $5.

INSPR Eye Fluff Brush (?): I don't think I've ever heard of this brand before. I've already tried it out and it's awesome. Very soft but dense enough to work as a blending brush or to apply eye shadow (particularly in the crease - of the EYE, you pervs). This is full sized and costs $12.

Clark's Botanicals Smoothing Marine Cream (CF): Good sized sample of a night cream. It smells kind of odd (not like Jasmine like everyone else claims) but it's nice and thick. The more you smooth it on your skin the more it feels like silk. Very interesting. It stings a bit, though, which I don't care for. Full size (50 ml) costs $115. Wow. Just...wow. This 15 ml sample should go for around $38.

The whole bag has a value around $67. I dig it!

PDs, MEHs, and GFYs May 2016

For you newbs, here's a quick explanation of this series of posts. Most YouTubers or Bloggers do something like Monthly Favorites or Hits and Misses every month. As I don't use up or go through stuff all that quickly, my post will show up every couple of months. So here you will find the products that are Pantry Droppers (the good), Meh (the average), and Go Fuck Yourselves (the shitty).

Below find the latest for May of 2016. (Again - I don't know the cruelty free status of most of the Korean brands. If I do, I will note it.)

PDs

Shara Shara Banana Honey Lotion: Sweet baby Jeebus this lotion is phenomenal. I got it in a Meme box years ago and it took a long time to get through it all. Smells just like banana cream pie (if you're into that sort of thing...which I am) and it made my skin so soft. It's in new packaging now but Amazon has it!

Nourish Organic Body Oil Mist: As this is a sample, it's not a mist format so it's a little messier to deal with but it's awesome. It doesn't smell like roses - more like just the rose hips, which is a little grassier than floral. Not a strong scent so that's fine with me. Loved using this after the shower. Will have to buy the full size. NO is cruelty free.

Promise Organic Argan Creme Face Lotion: I just talked about this in my Morgue Drawer but it needs to be discussed again, it's that nice. Non-greasy, fast absorbing, smells like oranges. Because it doesn't have SPF I used it as a night cream. As soon as I get through the stuff I have now, I'm buying more of this. PO is cruelty free.

Milani Moisture Lock Lip Treatment: I have the Rose scented one and I love it. It has a soft pink color in the tube but it's just clear oil/gloss on the lips. This is so moisturizing and lasts a  surprisingly long time on the lips. Most oils would wear off relatively fast but this likes to hang around for a while. I want to try all the other scents/flavors, too. Milani is cruelty free.

Dermal Sea Cucumber Supreme Mask: This really made my skin feel hydrated after using it. Probably because it's so saturated with essence that it was dripping all over me until I blotted it with a towel!

Leaders Black Aqua Pore Scaling mask: This was amazing! It tingled a bit when I wore it but not in a burning kind of way. The material was thick and super soft. My skin felt better after using it (it's for dry skin so I guess it's got extra moisturizers or something). See below for an amusing visual.

3W Fresh Syn-ake mask: Very nice and moisturizing but again, the 3W mask holes do not fit my face.

Mehron Paint Palette: I got this for a specific cosplay at Motor City Comic Con but it will be great for any other face/body painting I need to do. I practiced my make up several times before the actual costume day and I barely made a dent in these paints! They're water activated and once they dry, they really don't budge - unless you sweat or get spit upon or the natural oils of your skin start to break it down over time. I need to invest in some sealant!

Glamtech empty palette: I found this place on Etsy. I had a few single shadows/highlighters that had no home (along with a bunch of singles I depotted to clear up the clutter in my drawers....ewww...). This store will customize a palette for you! No more boring plain black or lame ass chevron patterns for you! You can choose from a bunch of different colors and designs. The top is held on by very strong magnets and they don't let go. I store mine upright in a desk letter organizer. I have since purchased another so I have this red bats one and a purple skeleton cameo palette. Awesome!

MEHs

Derma e Hydrating Night Creme: I used to love this stuff. But for some reason it decided it wanted to break up and it's moisturizing capabilities have left me high and dry (or at least dry). I can't even finish this jar because it feels like it's sucking the life out of my skin.

Essence Gel eyeliner: I used to really love this stuff, too. And when I first open the jar, it IS fantastic. But within a few weeks the gel starts to dry out. It gets harder and harder (that's what she said) to work with and crumbles all over the place. Maybe if I used it every day I'd get through it before it goes all Sahara.

Skinfood Mascara: It says setting mascara but the card from the 3B box this came in said it's used just like a regular mascara. It does makes my lashes look beautiful and long but it smudges all under my eyes by the end of the day. Maybe it doesn't do that on people whose eyelids are insured by Exxon.

GFYs

Simple Micellar make-up wipes: Pretty much exactly like their liquid format - useless and burny. Does not get off all makeup and hurt like fuck around the eyes. Simple is not cruelty free.

3W Clinic Collagen Serum: I tried to use this for about 2 weeks. I know skin can go into rebel mode when introduced to new things but even after an adjustment period, it kept breaking me out. Ugh.

Benton Snail Bee Steam Cream: Sticky, smelly face cream did absolutely nothing for me. Except give me big zits. So apparently Team Bee Snail is a shitty idea.

Secret Key toner: This felt like straight alcohol on my skin. Very drying and, naturally, irritated and broke out my skin. 

Maybelline Color Tattoo cream eye shadow: Completely useless. I thought it worked as a decent base but I thought wrong. It also dried up really fast. Maybelline is not cruelty free. Ass hats.

L'Oreal Revitalift Miracle Blur: I think this was a face primer but it didn't blur anything, felt greasy, and then balled up when I put foundation on over it. What the hell? L'Oreal isn't cruelty free anyway so no big loss there.

Palladio Flat brush: Not sure exactly when I bought this but I was a fucking idiot at the time and even more of a fucking idiot for keeping it this long. It's rough and prickly as fuck, like using a cactus to put on my eye makeup. Palladio is not cruelty free which is pretty obvious from this brush - if they don't give a rat's ass about the comfort of their customers, they sure as shit don't give a flying fuck about animals.

Okay that'll do it for now. Come back in a couple months to see what else had made me drop my drawers, shrug non-committally, or pissed me off so bad I had to go beat up a random hobo.

Morgue Drawer May 2016

And again with keeping on time, though I guess technically I should have posted this a few days ago. But I was at Motor City Comic Con with my writing group so GET OFF MY BACK!

Anyway...let's get to it, shall we?

(Side note: I'm unsure about the cruelty free status of most of the Korean brands. If I know for sure, I'll mention it. Eventually I'll get to the point where I'll just mark CF or NCF but let's ease into that later.)

BECAUSE I'M ALL ABOUT THAT FACE, 'BOUT THAT FACE...

Neutrogena Oil-Free Moisture face lotion: I've used this stuff for years. Nice and lightweight, can put on two layers to get some extra moisturizing, and it's got SPF 15. Unfortunately, Neutrogena is NOT cruelty free so I've got to find an alternative.

Promise Organic Argan Creme face lotion: Speaking of alternatives, this would be a great one. Moisturizes very well without that greasy shiny look/feel that the Neutrogena one can give. And it smells like fresh oranges. This brand IS cruelty free but it doesn't have SPF. I like my face lotion to have sunscreen because I don't always wear makeup so I can't rely on that for sun protection.

Etude House Wonder Pore toner: Not sure this did anything. It didn't over dry my skin or make it break out but did it do anything else? *shrug*

Dr. Brandt PoreDermabrasion: Absolutely TERRIBLE stuff. The scrub was way too harsh and it actually caused two HUGE break outs on my chin. I'm also pretty sure this brand is NOT cruelty free so Dr. Brandt can just go fuck off.

Too Cool For School Egg Mellow Cream: I have a few more sample packs to use up so I'll get a better idea how this works. Initial trial worked well. Nice, thick cream that's very moisturizing. I'm excited to try the rest.

Sephora Lingzhi eye mask: Not really sure if this anti-aged or smoothed anything but my skin felt nice afterwards. Unfortunately, Sephora is not cruelty free so I won't be purchasing anything else from their line. (Note: when I went to find the link, this particular eye mask was no longer available - shocked, I tell you.)

3W Clinic Royal Jelly mask: Super saturated mask. My skin felt great after using it but the cut outs (for eyes, nose, etc.) do not fit my face well at all. It's kind of annoying. I don't want the essence...DEAR GODS IT'S ON MY EYEBALL!!

Botanic Farm Rice mask: This was an awesome cotton mask. Very saturated and the material was super soft. The cut outs fit so much better on my face than the 3W. Really enjoyed this one. (Note: as of the time I'm typing this, the only place I can find that sells this is Meme Box and they're currently sold out.)

GEE YOUR HAIR SMELLS LIKE YOU WERE BORN WITH IT

Hask Thickening Conditioner: Very nice. Smells softly of mint, not overpowering or sweet. Don't think it thickened my hair, though. Waiting to finish the shampoo and move on to another Hask product. This brand is cruelty free.

L'Oreal Total Repair 5 Conditioner: It's okay. I used it when I was coloring my hair and it was all frizzy and dry. Meh. L'Oreal is not cruelty free.

Batiste Dry Shampoo: The Fresh scent is better than the others I've tried but it can still be a little overpowering. There's a lot of mixed info out there about this brand, though their parent company tests on animals. As there are a ton of CF alternatives I haven't tried yet, I'll probably work through my current can and move on to something else afterwards.

Smashbox Full Exposure mascara: I really liked this mascara for volume. It was also really great to layer with other mascaras that didn't thicken lashes very well. Smashbox is not CF, though, so I'll never buy this brand (this was a sample I got in Ipsy, I think).

Maybelline Define-A-Lash mascara: Really great at separating lashes and defining them (go figure). But you could never build it up - it just got clumpy, even if layered with another mascara. Maybelline is not CF.

Covergirl Clump Crusher mascara: This was a fantastic mascara. Great at separating lashes and giving a bit of length and volume. Never clumped up even with multiple layers. Covergirl is not CF.

SMOOTH AS AN ANDROID'S BOTTOM

Nivea In-Shower lotion: Awesome, awesome stuff. Smells nice and the softness lasted on my skin all day. Unfortunately, Nivea is not CF.

Nivea Kiss of...lip balms: These have been some of my favorite balms. I didn't like the cherry or SPF one but these two are phenomenal. Makes me so sad that Nivea isn't CF. 

Marlowe body lotion: This is an okay moisturizer but the scent is heavy on the herbal side which I didn't care for. This brand is cruelty free, though!

Revo lip balm: It was all right. I've had a few others and this one probably had the best scent/flavor. But it's really waxy and doesn't last long on the lips. Because this is a Walgreens brand, it's not CF.

DIRTY AND HAIRY IS NO WAY TO GO THROUGH LIFE

Bath and Body Works foaming hand soap: Most of their scents are spot on for me. Rainkissed Leaves was clean and fresh, not too heavy; Coastal Water Lily was too strong (but lilies can be very heady); the Kitchen Lemon is the best. Unfortunately, BBW sells their products in China so even though they are CF here in the US, they are basically supporting animal testing elsewhere. Honestly, though, if I can't find another soap/candle/body wash brand that works for me, I will probably continue to purchase these few things from them.

Sally Hansen spray on hair remover: This stuff has an overpowering smell, as do most depilatories. But I like the convenience of a spray on. It works pretty well on thick coarse hair (read: bikini line) but I still need to use a wash cloth to help remove the foam/hair (even though you're supposed to be able to just rinse it off). Sally Hansen isn't cruelty free.

Okay. That covers the last couple of months. Tune in around mid-July for the next installment!

3B April 2016 Review

I'm still on the fence about whether or not I want to keep this subscription. Over a week ago I stared using one of the products I got a few months back and my skin started breaking out. Ugh. Even without the cruelty free issues, I'm not sure the 50/50 odds I'm getting on the skin care  is enough to keep this.

For those who may not know, 3B is a monthly subscription service that provides 4-5 sample sized (sometimes full) Asian beauty products. If you'd like to check them out, go here: 3B

Botanic Farm Mask: I so love sheet masks. Rice is supposed to help purify skin and is good for sensitive skin. So that's cool. Since I'm doing body/face paint for a convention in a couple days, I'll use this afterwards to see if it helps my face recover! Full size value of $2.

Lador Sleeping Clinic Ampoule: This is one of those hair treatments that's supposed to help severely damaged hair. As I don't bleach or color my hair right now, I'm not sure how much it will help. Maybe I'll gift it to someone. This is full size and runs $5 (or $3 on sale at MemeBox)

Benton Honest Cleansing Foam: Again, I'm a little leery of this because the last skin care product broke me out - and I believe this brand also broke me out. But it's usually the creams or serums that do it so hopefully this cleanser won't screw me over. This little sample is maybe worth $1. Full size is $10.

Too Cool for School Egg Mellow Cream: I did try one of the packets already. Nice thick cream and felt really good. I don't know if longer use will break me out but after the first trial, I'm hopeful it'll be fine. Not sure how much came in each little packet but there are 7 of them so you could use them once a day for a week to get an idea of how your skin likes it. Full size, 50g, is about $24.

It's Skin Babyface Eyeshadow: If my research is right, this company IS cruelty free. I have a face power I've been using for a long time that is awesome. So I'm excited for this shadow. And look at that color! These little pans will cost you around $5.

If I give a $3 value to the little packets of face cream, which is probably pretty generous, this month's bag value is about $16. That's kinda skimpy and a little disappointing but it's the first time the value of the bag has been so low. If it happens again, I might get off the 'considering' fence and migrate into full on cancellation land. We'll see...

Petit Vour April 2016

A quick recap: I've been trying to go cruelty free with my makeup. And in that pursuit, I thought I'd try out a beauty subscription service that provides ALL cruelty free/organic/vegan products. Petite Vour is such a subscription service. I only signed up for three months to test it out (as opposed to a subscription - which will run you about $15 each month). If you'd like to check them out, go here: PETIT VOUR

Petit Vour comes in a cute little pink box. After you open it, the "Be Bold. Be Kind." slogan stares up at you with its big soft bunny eyes. It's actually kinda cool. I even love that the card inside, which has all the product info/pricing on the back (TAKE NOTE, IPSY), greets me with a hearty "hooray" and a spray of flowers. That other card is specific to one of the products - extra directions and info. It was a little intimidating. You'll understand when I describe it.

As the items in this box are organic and vegan and all that jazz, don't be surprised by some higher price tags.

Studio 78 Paris Organic Makeup (eyeshadow): The grey swatches you see are of the color eyeshadow I received. Really nice dark grey color with a taupe undertone. Very different. You can keep it light so more of that taupe shows through or build it up to a nice charcoal grey. Apparently no chemicals and bad shit in this brand's makeup so that's good! This will cost you $31-34.  

Kumari River Bath & Body Oil: I do like a nice body oil. You can either put a few dropper fulls into your bath water or rub it into your skin (unless you get the hose again...) after 'hydrotherapy' - read: shower/bath/steam/19th century therapy for mental illness. It smells really nice - little minty, little citrus. I'll try it out this weekend at Comic Con. The gods know I'll probably need some good hydrotherapy at least once. This sample bottle is $8.50 (full size $34).

Bedrock & Bloom Smart Ash Teeth Whitener (extra card was for this product): Okay this stuff scared me a little. It's a black powder that you use to whiten your teeth. Yes, seems contradictory, I know. Just wet your toothbrush, dip it in the powder, and brush your teeth. They give specific instructions and helpful hints to keep your bathroom and yourself relatively clean (this stuff stains, obvi). And I think it actually works. The sample is worth $3, a full jar will cost you $30. But a little goes a very long way.

Arrrgghh and avast, ye scurvy scallywags!

Juara Hand & Nail Balm: Like everything made with coconut something or other, this cream is nice but a little heavy on the coconut scent. It also doesn't really feel like my skin is that much softer or smoother after using it. Maybe I need to use more at once time? This sample tube is $2.50. Full size is $25.

If I had set this up as a monthly subscription, my $15 would have gotten me $45 worth of stuff. That's pretty dang good! I'm excited to see how the next two boxes stack up (ha! see what I did there?).

Universal Yums April 2016 Box

Pizza in Poland is often topped with: A. Ketchup; B. Sour Cream; C. Mayonnaise; D Spaghetti Sauce.

If you really wanna know the answer, comment on this post!

This was just one of the trivia questions in April's Universal Yums box. For those who may not know, UY is a monthly food subscription. For $13 (which is the size we pay for) or $25 each month, you'll receive a box full of snacks and candy from a different county. It's so fun to get these and try foods that might not be something we here in America automatically turn to for sustenance. Or a gluttonous night of binge watching TV shows.

Check out this service here: UNIVERSAL YUMS

As you've probably figured out by now, this month brings us snacks from Poland. I have tried everything in this one and I must say....sooooo goooood!

Onion Potato Prazynki: these are Poland's version of the potato chip. The texture is...odd to say the least. Kind of like really thin styrofoam. But the flavor is phenomenal!

Katarzynki Dark Chocolate Gingerbread: not my favorite. The gingerbread texture is airy and spongy which makes me think it's stale. Also the molasses content is too high for me making it more bitter. But the chocolate is awesome.

Krowki Milky Cream Fudge: Very nice flavor on these. They do have a dryer fudge consistency so they aren't messy or gooey. Just soft and creamy and delicious.

E Wedel Chalwa: This is like eating the inside of a Butterfinger but instead of a peanut base it's sesame seed. Not super sweet and a little flakier and drier than it's American counterpart. But still good.

Prince Polo Hazelnut: Remember those sugar wafer cookies we grew up with (that are actually still made today)? This is a similar consistency - creamy hazelnut filling between layers of wafers then covered with chocolate. It's not as sweet as ours, which is a good thing, and it's probably my second favorite treat this month!

Solidarnosc Candied Plums: Basically it's chocolate covered dried fruit. I've had several versions of that here in the US but never plums. The plum gives a nice unique sweetness to this treat. Dare I say I liked it better than chocolate covered dried cherries? Yes, I dare.

Wawel Raczki "Lobster Tails": I don't know why these are called lobster tails. The booklet says that it's because of the pink & white candy shell. Huh? Whatever. The outer candy shell is thin and sweet and there's a crispy peanut filling inside with a hint of rum! Yes, please!

Milka Chocolate Covered Cow: No, it's not real cow. It's a cow shaped cookie with chocolate coating on one side. The cookie tastes like a mixture of pretzel, graham cracker, and vanilla and the chocolate is delicious!

E Wedel Panna Cotta Milk Chocolate Bar: O.M.F.G. This is the best snack in the box. I've had Polish chocolate before and it's fantastic. This, with sweet cream filling and raspberry preserves - HOLY FUCKING SHIT. You know how Ambrosia is supposedly the food of the gods? NOPE. It's this stuff! And I bet you can find it at a local Polish market. If not....RAAAAMPAAAAGGGEEEE!!

I'm tempted to say this month might have edged out the France box, even though that one was twice the size. I really would have paid $13 just for that Panna Cotta bar. 

The clue given for next month makes us think it's Greece so I'm excited to see what we'll get!

Ipsy April 2016 Review

For those who may not know, Ipsy is a monthly subscription service. For $10, you will get a (sometimes) cute beauty bag with 4-5 samples, or full sized, beauty, skin, and hair products. It's a nice way to try new brands without committing to the full price tag! Check them out here: IPSY

I think from this point on I will try to remember to mark which brands are cruelty free (CF).

The theme for April is Dream On. WHHHHYYYYYYYY ARE THEY SO USELESS WITH THESE FUCKING THEMES??? The bag is kind of cute, though. The back is a bright yellow with tie-dye colors mixed in. I'm not mad at it. But the contents.....let's just break them down.

Crown Duo-Fiber Blush Brush: I always like getting brushes. I've received one or two Crown brushes before and they are awesome. So damn soft! They retail for about $24. That, right there, already covers the value of an Ipsy subscription. (CF - as far as their synthetic brushes go. Not sure how they can guarantee their suppliers of animal hair brushes are harvested cruelty free but that's what they claim).

Tarte Cosmetics LipSurgence Lip Creme: (right swatch below) I was super excited to get this. Tarte is one of those higher end brands that I've only ever purchased once with my own money (eye shadow palette that was decent). This is a generous sample size. The lip crayon is very creamy and has a nice minty scent - but it's not super strong so if you're sensitive to that, it shouldn't bother you too much. Full size is .1 ounces ($24) so this .05 sample runs about $12. And look at that color. So pretty! (CF)

Ok. That's about all I like from this bag. Let's get to the rest.

Nomad Cosmetics Eye Shadow in Desert Sands: Oh yay. Another bronze shade. Awesome. While the color is beautiful (left swatch above), feels soft, and it's a decent sample size, I'M SO FUCKING SICK OF BRONZE COLORS. Cripes. I know they want to put in colors that are more universal but shit - BRONZE IS NOT THE ONLY ONE, YOU KNOW. I can't find a price on this as it looks like the brand doesn't sell these individually but you can see the whole palette this comes from along with other palettes - which actually look pretty gorgeous and a good deal for everything you get. (CF)

Briogeo Overnight Hair Oil Treatment: While this concept is slightly intriguing, I don't look forward to the mess it will create. Since I'm not bleaching and coloring my hair right now, I don't really need this product. But I'll hang on to it just in case that changes....HAHA! Who am I kidding? I'll be so bored with my grey in about 2 months, I can feel it...Full size is 2 ounces ($28) so this sample of .3 ounces is probably around $9. (CF)

Juliette Has a Gun: It's called Not a Perfume so then what the fuck is it, JHAG? Oh, it's just a 'minimal scent', whatever the fuck that means. Personally I think it smells like algae water that passed through an isopropyl alcohol factory where an Orc grabbed it, drank it down then pissed it out onto a hobbit's head. This .16 ounce sample is about $20 (50 mls will cost you $100 and 100 mls is $135). (CF)

For the products I found pricing on, this bag is worth about $65. Pretty slick, Ipsy. Though I'm not super excited about 3 of the 5 products (#firstworldproblems, I know), I can't be too angry because they all come from companies that practice cruelty free/vegan/eco-friendly business.

See you all next month!

3B March 2016 Beauty Box

Okay, yes. I had the wrong month on the last review. For some reason I thought I missed one but apparently, I didn't. So last month was February and THIS month is March.

Glad we cleared that up.

3B is a monthly beauty subscription box. For $12 a month you get 4-5 samples/full sized Asian beauty, hair, skin products. Click on the link to get one for yourself!

Dermal Dream Sea Cucumber mask: You know I love face masks. I'm very excited to try this out. Apparently this brand, and this particular mask, are INFAMOUS in Korea. La dee dah! (sorry can't find a link for it)

Skinfood My Shortcake mascara: I also love trying different mascaras. This one is supposed to thicken, lengthen (soooo dirty...), and darken my lashes. It also dries quickly and is smudgeproof. My oily eyelids accept that challenge! Full size and it goes for about $7 on Amazon.

Secret Key Witch Hazel toner: I've used straight up witch hazel as a toner before so this is cool. But I think there's added fragrance in here because it doesn't smell as...earthy as regular witch hazel. This is full size and runs around $29!

CosRx Blackhead Silk Finger Balls: My word there's a lot of dirty innuendo in this post. These are little hard (hooo boy) cotton pods that go on your fingers. You soak them in hot water for a couple of minutes then "massage the desired area (wow) with the softened pod". And as I post the picture below, I can't help but notice a slight pornographic nature in it. You can get 2-3 uses from each one. A set of 12 (which is what I believe I got) costs around $5.

I can't even...

Just those three products I could find on-line are valued at about $41. Nice! You guys should get this service, too. Then we can all be dirty together.

Walmart Spring Beauty Box 2016

This will be my final Walmart subscription. I decided to cancel it as this Spring box didn't offer one product from a company that's cruelty free. For those of you who've read my blog, I'm trying to use as many beauty products as I can from companies that don't test on animals. I'm sure I won't be 100% successful in this quest but I'll do my best!

That said, let's get into this review. If you'd like to get your own box, check them out here: Walmart Beauty Box

(I've only tried the little foil samples of products (3) and the foundation samples but the rest I've collected to donate somewhere - by the way, if anyone reading this wants any of this, just contact me!)

Vera Wang Embrace perfume: while the smell is okay, I do love that it came in a mini spray bottle, not one of those teeny tube/wand combos that are IMPOSSIBLE to open without spilling the product everywhere.

Neutrogena Colorstick in Almond Nude: I actually got rid of this exact same shade in my makeup cull recently. It's a nice nude color. I didn't even take the plastic off so I can donate it as brand spanking (ohhhh) new.

Cetaphil Cleanser: nice travel/sample size. I've heard good things about this brand.

Jergens Wet Skin Moisture: this is one of those in shower moisturizers. I have another tube exactly like this that I hadn't even opened yet so I'm planning to give both of them away. The smell is really nice.

Colgate Optic White: this product I kept. If I didn't need to use sensitive toothpaste, I'd be using this. Very good at keeping teeth white without any extra strips or whitening products. So the hubs gets it!

Aveeno Night Cream: Nice little sample size. Can't say if it's any good though!

Roc Multi Correction Cream: I've used the Roc Retinol products before, which work well, but I've never used this one. I'm guessing it's probably pretty good.

Banana Boat Sunscreen: We just bought a big tube of this brand, but not this exact product, before our Florida trip last month. That stuff is okay. Little heavy on the scent but seems to work just fine. 

For the foil packets/little smidge of products:

Neutrogena Healthy Skin liquid makeup/Acne Correct & Cover tinted moisturizer: The first two shades would have worked for me, one as a peachy concealer for dark circles and the other for pure foundation. The tinted moisturizer was the wrong shade for me.

L'Oreal Miracle Blur: didn't notice any blurring effect of this stuff (it's used like a make up primer). But it did ball up on itself so...that sucked.

Olay Regenerist Micro Sculpting Cream and Tone Perfecting Cream: Both felt nice but left my skin feeling kind of dry. Even if I wasn't going cruelty free I'd never buy this stuff.

There were also coupons for most of the products in here, which is cool if you end up falling in love with one of them. Pretty good value for $7, right? *shrugs* Fare thee well, Walmart. I wish you happiness and success!

Universal Yums March 2016 Box

For those who may not know, Universal Yums is a food subscription service. For $13 (or $25) a month, you get a box filled with yummy treats from around the world -  a different country each time. Check them out!   UNIVERSAL YUMS

This month brings us goodies from the Philippines! (don't mind the spelling error on the front cover of the booklet - they got it right everywhere else). It's unusual that the hubs and I eat most of the snacks before I can write up a review. But aside from maybe 4 candies, this baby is GONE.

Golden Sweet Corn - this went pretty fast. There are supposedly only 2 servings in the whole thing but we made it last for days. They're the consistency of cheesy poofs but they taste straight up like sweet corn in the middle of summer. SO DAMN GOOD. I need to contact the UY folks to see if we can buy this anywhere!!

Pandan Cake (green package) - little dry but it tasted like a nice light vanilla cake.

Goldilocks Polvoron (purple and brown wrappers up  front) - these are shortbread cookies. I had the purple one (Ube flavor - purple yam). Not too sweet. Kind of tasted like taro. Very yummy. The other is cookies and cream flavor, which I don't like, so the hubs got that one.

Pinky Goodies Butterscotch Bar - you can't see the package but it's in there. It was a small moist cake. It was white chocolate flavored but I could taste the butterscotch more. It was really good.

King Choc Nut - I didn't know what to expect with these. They're small little squares of chocolate but the consistency is what I imagine chalk would be if not pressed into a stick. Though that was weird, it was DELICIOUS. 

Lipps Mango Candy is supposed to color your lips, like other hard candies can, but not so much. Flavor was outstanding though. XO Coffee candy tasted like coffee with cream and a little sugar. Awesome. The only candy we haven't tried are the Melon Dew Menthol candies. You can probably imagine why.

So aside from the big ass France box we got in February, I think this one has been the biggest success for us. Usually we take a long time to eat through everything to help it last until the next box. But now we have to wait SOOOOO LOOOOONNNGG for April! Which might be Poland, if we deciphered the clues correctly. If you're not getting this box, I highly recommend you give them a try!

Ipsy March 2016 Review

For those who may not know, Ipsy is a monthly subscription service for beauty, skin, and hair care products. For  $10 each month, you will receive 4-5 samples (sometimes full size) to try. It's a nice way to test drive a new brand without committing to the full price.

(as always, I purchase this service with my own money and all opinions are my honest ones)

This month's theme is Hello Spring, however useless that may be. The bag is okay. The print is nice enough but the material is really weird. Almost feels like those LeSac bags that were popular in the 80s. Yes, that just dated me. Shut up.

Living Proof Dry Shampoo - I like a good dry shampoo. Don't know if this is one but I've another hair product from this brand that I like quite a bit. So fingers crossed! This 1.8 ounce can goes for $12.

Nourish Organics Body Oil Mist - Not exactly sure how this can be a mist via squeezie tube but I'll give it a shot (full size is actually a spray bottle - okay, that makes sense). I've only tested it on dry skin. Not that great. I bet this works better on damp skin, like right after a shower. I'll let you know! Full size (3 ounces) is $20 so this .5 ounce tube is about $3 (UPDATE: Yes, it works much better on damp skin and it's pretty awesome)

Me Me Me Loose Powder Brush - I am NEVER mad at getting a brush in these subscriptions. And though I've never heard of this brand, the brush is super soft. It's the perfect size for putting loose powder on my face. I've already used it a half a dozen times. Love. It goes for 14 pounds which is $20 US.

Temptu Brozer - I think this is supposed to be for those airbrush machine thingies. I got a highlighter from this brand early on in my subscription service. And while I don't have one of those airbrush machine thingies, I can still use this. It's a liquid so a little goes a long way. It looks kind of orange in the swatch but it blends out even further so it looks very natural on my skin tone. Full size, 8 ml, goes for $35. So this .25 ounce bottle (which, if I did my math correctly, should be just over 7 mls) is pretty comparable in the price point. Holy crap.

NYX Liquid Suede Cream Lipstick - for those of you who've been reading my posts for a bit already know how I feel about these. Ugh. Disappointed that I got one in my bag this month. I thought maybe because this color is lighter than the one I originally purchased it might be better. Not really. It definitely doesn't look as shitty as the darker color and it sure as hell isn't as drying. But it's patchy and wears off weird. I may not have put an even layer on, though, so I'll play with it a few more times. I got the color Pink Lust and while it's something I don't normally wear, because neon, it is strangely appealing. This is a full size, though, and it goes for $7.

Damn. The value of this bag is about $75 (give or take a few for conversion oopsies). That's pretty good. Whoop!

PDs, MEHs, and GFYs (March 2016 Edition)

Yes! I'm still on schedule! Enjoy it while it lasts, people.

PDs (Panty Droppers)

Nivea Men Post Shave Balm - I know what you're saying. Uh, Peggy, that's a MEN'S product. Yes, yes it is. But apparently one of the beauty mavens on YouTube used this in place of her moisturizer (because she was at her boyfriend's place and didn't have any) and noticed how great it was as a primer. And damn if she wasn't right! Its main ingredient is glycerin which is what helps makeup last longer on your face. It feels so nice on the skin and it smells like boy. It is a strong smell so it's not for everyone. But I love it. Comes in a sensitive formula, too.

ELF Makeup Mist & Set - I've been using this makeup setting spray for years. I think this might be my fifth bottle (it lasts a long time, btw). No major scent that I can tell and it helps my makeup last so much longer than without it. And it's like $3! I linked their site but you can get this brand at Meijer and Target and possibly Walgreens or Walmart.

L'Oreal Infallible Pro-Matte Foundation - I'm not a huge foundation gal. I have a few but I usually reach for a BB or CC cream first. But I got this on a whim and tried it a few times. Damn if this stuff doesn't make my skin look awesome. I thought it would look too dry, as it's matte, but it really doesn't. And it stays on the skin for HOURS! As in, all day. Good stuff.

Kat Von D Tattoo Liquid Eyeliner - Several people had recommended this product so eventually I caved and spent the $20 to get one. Um...worth every penny. I got the Mad Max Brown color and it's gorgeous. It dries down and doesn't fucking move all day. After about 8 hours, the wing I'd made did start to break down but I have watery eyes so I think that contributed to it. Otherwise, this liner is TITS!

MEHs

Maybelline Dream Velvet Foundation (left swatch) - I admit. YouTube reviews made me want this. And while the color is a decent match for me (nice pink undertone) and the foundation feels nice, it looks awful. I've tried blending this with brushes and sponges and both ways look dry and cakey on me. It looks nice on a lot of people. Just not me.

Milani Eyebrow Gel (middle swatch) - I love Milani products so when they came out with an eyebrow gel, I needed to get it. The color is awesome. It's a nice cool toned brown. And the brush is small (not as small as L'Oreal brow plumper but not as big as NYX's brow gel) so it's easy to work with. The trouble is I can't get any fucking product on the damn brush! No matter how many times I dip that into the tube, barely anything comes out. I had to dip it 3 times to get that swatch above. And, once it dries, it flakes. A lot. *is sad* Maybe if I had more brow hairs to hold onto the product it would be better. I think it is one of those fiber gels. Oh well. They have other stuff I can try next!

Colourpop Highlighter  (right swatch) - Now, I love a lot of CP stuff. I do want to do a one-brand review soon. But every now and again, something just hits me wrong. When I first got this, I thought it was a beautiful soft gold/champagne highlight with a little shimmer. And while the product itself is wonderful and the color is gorgeous, it's mostly glitter. I've tried it for weeks and on days when my skin was drier or softer or really hydrated. It still looks the same. I don't mind some glitter now and again but I just couldn't get down with this, no matter how much I wanted to. I linked their whole highlighter page because they have others that are awesome.

GFYs (Go Fuck Yourselves)

CVS Eye Makeup Remover - I've used this stuff a lot but someone somewhere along the food chain of CVS product development totally fucked this up. The "NEW" label obviously means "Useless and Burny" because that's what this is. You can see how much I used of the contents before screaming my rage from my rooftop.

Acure Day Cream - Maybe I should have put this in the MEH category but any skin care product that breaks me out deserves to be shoved down the garbage disposal. Loved the smell. Hated the product.

Too Faced Shadow Insurance - Um, for a brand that's so fucking pricey, I expected more. I don't mean quantity as this is a sample. But I mean in quality. The eye shadows I've used aren't that great and this primer follows suit. It doesn't work that well and after a month or so started separating (as in when I squeezed the tube, nasty oily liquid splooged out). What the hell, TF? 

Rimmel Stay Glossy - I know it looks pink in the tube but it's basically colorless. If I wanted colorless gloss, that's what I'd buy. Also the shimmers have separated from the gloss (2nd pic - that dark pink band is where I swiped the applicator in the bottle). If I have to mix my gloss every time...fuck you, Rimmel. (can't find the color I have - SHOCKING - so I linked another one)

Wet & Wild Megalast Liquid Lip Color - Not sure if W&W was trying to be like the bazillion other liquid lipsticks out there but I think they missed. While the color on these are gorgeous, there's so much glitter in them that they feel gritty. Like 40 grade sandpaper. Yeah, that's exactly what I want to put on my mouth. Jerks.

Swisspers Cotton Swabs - Yep. I'm still of the school of thinking that anything less than the Q-Tip brand is not worth a bucket of spit. And when you can get 300 Swisspers for $1, don't put that shit anywhere near your body. Use it for arts and crafts or something. Not your face or your ears, okay? I don't even have the package anymore because I threw them all into my crafting bag.

All righty. That covers the last two months. Come back and see me in May when I will praise, shrug off, or set a flame the next list of products.

March Morgue Drawer

It's been EXACTLY 2 months since I posted my last MD. Way to keep on schedule, Monkey. WOOHOO!

BEAT THAT MUG

Top Picture:

Mario Badescu Facial Spray - I use this stuff every morning after I wash my face but before I put on my moisturizer. It smells like roses and makes my skin feel soft. I'll mist this on during the day, too, if I want a little refresher. Already repurchased.

Chapstick Hydration Lock Day/Night - the day side, with SPF, was actually drying. Did not like at all. The night side was much better but I accidentally smooshed it before I could finish it up. Oh well.

Peter Thomas Roth Oilless Oil - Um, feels like oil to me, pal. Nice, light, worked as a good extra layer of moisture under my night cream. Not sure I'd use it in the summer though.

H2O+ Micro Collagen Moisturizer - felt soft, like a silicone primer, but my skin still felt tight and dry. Had to double up or use an oil underneath.

Be a Bombshell Lip Balm - LOVED this stuff. Very smooth and soft. Lasted on my lips for a long time.

Advanced Snail 96 Essence - I can't tell if this serum did anything but I liked the texture of it. Felt like a thin gel, not an oil. My skin did look nice but who knows if this alone was responsible.

Sephora Rose Eye Mask - It felt nice. Didn't really see a difference in my under eye though.

3W Clinic Masks - The Aloe mask felt super soft. Didn't feel like it did much, though. The Snail mask was dry as hell. The Milk mask was nice and my skin felt very moisturized after. (I linked the Aloe one but you can search for the others from there)

Missha Eye Patch - Technically, there were two. It actually burned a little. My skin felt dry after I took them off.

Hada Labo Anti Aging Mask - very nice mask, super saturated with essence. My skin felt really nice after. But anti aging? *shrugs*

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CVS Oil Free Eye Makeup Remover (dupe for Neutrogena brand)- meh. Does an okay job but it stung a little.

Nip+Fab Exfoliating Facial Pads - Loved these. Smell is good, soft and light. And they're not rough. The exfoliating comes from the glycolic acid, I believe. It did feel like there was a film on my skin but more of a protective one as opposed to that unclean feeling. Kinda cool.

Vasanti Enzymatic Face Cleanser - nice cleanser but way too harsh for my skin. It actually created bumps on my face. Not cool.

Simple Cleansing Micellar Water - meh. Does an okay job but it doesn't remove all makeup. It stings a bit on the eyes, too.

Montagne Jeunesse Cucumber Peel Off Mask - I've tried a bunch from this brand and this was just okay. The smell is super strong and I didn't see or feel any difference in my skin.

Skin Food 3-Step System - Egg White Pore Foam was a great cleanser. The Water Berry Serum felt super light and smelled great! The Miracle 10 Cream has a nice floral scent, moisturized very well, and it lasted all night. A great trio face care system.

DOES A BODY GOOD (OR NOT)

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Mitchell and Peach Body Cream - nice light cream, absorbs well. Smells TERRIBLE.

Albertini International Divine Skin Hydrator - this is  the first in-shower moisturizer I ever used. Loved it! Doesn't leave the shower too slippery and the moisture lasted all day.

Etude House "My Castle" Rose Hand Cream - AWESOME AWESOME! This is a nice thick hand cream. Very moisturizing and it smells just like fresh cut roses. I have a lot of good luck with Etude House products.

La Vanilla Body Butter - I think I talked about this in a PD/MEH/GFY post. The cream is nice but the smell is so artificial and kind of sickening. Their perfume is awesome but this stuff sucks.

NSpa Coconut Body Butter - the smell is very artificial but the cream itself is fantastic. My skin felt soft all day.

Schick Hydro Razor - the moisture strip surrounding the blades wears out really fast but it's still a decent razor.

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Bath and Body Works Vampire Blood Foaming Soap - I've kind of fallen in love with foaming hand soaps. Smells like plums but it's very sweet - might be off putting to some. (this was a limited edition Halloween scent but the link will take you to the rest of their foaming soaps)

Caress Body Wash - these are good body washes. This scent is very strong but it didn't seem overpowering.

Marc Anthony Oil of Morocco Hair Spray - at this point, I will never buy another hair spray besides this one. Light hold, smells fantastic. This is my 2nd or 3rd travel size. I get the full sized can, too.

Oil of Olay Body Wash - this was very nice. Soft scent and really hydrated my skin.

Bath and Body Works Sensual Body Wash - LOOOOOOOOVE this scent. I have another bottle just waiting for me.

Okay. That should do it for this installment. Tune in mid May (probably AFTER Comic Con) for the continuing saga of shit I've used up...