The Monkey Is In.

So be prepared. Bring a banana.

I'm a writer of horror and dark fiction. I've been doing this since 1999 and believe me when I say, it's cheaper than therapy and safer for the world at large.

Filtering by Tag: Olay

Walmart Spring Beauty Box 2016

This will be my final Walmart subscription. I decided to cancel it as this Spring box didn't offer one product from a company that's cruelty free. For those of you who've read my blog, I'm trying to use as many beauty products as I can from companies that don't test on animals. I'm sure I won't be 100% successful in this quest but I'll do my best!

That said, let's get into this review. If you'd like to get your own box, check them out here: Walmart Beauty Box

(I've only tried the little foil samples of products (3) and the foundation samples but the rest I've collected to donate somewhere - by the way, if anyone reading this wants any of this, just contact me!)

Vera Wang Embrace perfume: while the smell is okay, I do love that it came in a mini spray bottle, not one of those teeny tube/wand combos that are IMPOSSIBLE to open without spilling the product everywhere.

Neutrogena Colorstick in Almond Nude: I actually got rid of this exact same shade in my makeup cull recently. It's a nice nude color. I didn't even take the plastic off so I can donate it as brand spanking (ohhhh) new.

Cetaphil Cleanser: nice travel/sample size. I've heard good things about this brand.

Jergens Wet Skin Moisture: this is one of those in shower moisturizers. I have another tube exactly like this that I hadn't even opened yet so I'm planning to give both of them away. The smell is really nice.

Colgate Optic White: this product I kept. If I didn't need to use sensitive toothpaste, I'd be using this. Very good at keeping teeth white without any extra strips or whitening products. So the hubs gets it!

Aveeno Night Cream: Nice little sample size. Can't say if it's any good though!

Roc Multi Correction Cream: I've used the Roc Retinol products before, which work well, but I've never used this one. I'm guessing it's probably pretty good.

Banana Boat Sunscreen: We just bought a big tube of this brand, but not this exact product, before our Florida trip last month. That stuff is okay. Little heavy on the scent but seems to work just fine. 

For the foil packets/little smidge of products:

Neutrogena Healthy Skin liquid makeup/Acne Correct & Cover tinted moisturizer: The first two shades would have worked for me, one as a peachy concealer for dark circles and the other for pure foundation. The tinted moisturizer was the wrong shade for me.

L'Oreal Miracle Blur: didn't notice any blurring effect of this stuff (it's used like a make up primer). But it did ball up on itself so...that sucked.

Olay Regenerist Micro Sculpting Cream and Tone Perfecting Cream: Both felt nice but left my skin feeling kind of dry. Even if I wasn't going cruelty free I'd never buy this stuff.

There were also coupons for most of the products in here, which is cool if you end up falling in love with one of them. Pretty good value for $7, right? *shrugs* Fare thee well, Walmart. I wish you happiness and success!

March Morgue Drawer

It's been EXACTLY 2 months since I posted my last MD. Way to keep on schedule, Monkey. WOOHOO!

 

BEAT THAT MUG

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Mario Badescu Facial Spray - I use this stuff every morning after I wash my face but before I put on my moisturizer. It smells like roses and makes my skin feel soft. I'll mist this on during the day, too, if I want a little refresher. Already repurchased.

Chapstick Hydration Lock Day/Night - the day side, with SPF, was actually drying. Did not like at all. The night side was much better but I accidentally smooshed it before I could finish it up. Oh well.

Peter Thomas Roth Oilless Oil - Um, feels like oil to me, pal. Nice, light, worked as a good extra layer of moisture under my night cream. Not sure I'd use it in the summer though.

H2O+ Micro Collagen Moisturizer - felt soft, like a silicone primer, but my skin still felt tight and dry. Had to double up or use an oil underneath.

Be a Bombshell Lip Balm - LOVED this stuff. Very smooth and soft. Lasted on my lips for a long time.

Advanced Snail 96 Essence - I can't tell if this serum did anything but I liked the texture of it. Felt like a thin gel, not an oil. My skin did look nice but who knows if this alone was responsible.

Sephora Rose Eye Mask - It felt nice. Didn't really see a difference in my under eye though.

3W Clinic Masks - The Aloe mask felt super soft. Didn't feel like it did much, though. The Snail mask was dry as hell. The Milk mask was nice and my skin felt very moisturized after. (I linked the Aloe one but you can search for the others from there)

Missha Eye Patch - Technically, there were two. It actually burned a little. My skin felt dry after I took them off.

Hada Labo Anti Aging Mask - very nice mask, super saturated with essence. My skin felt really nice after. But anti aging? *shrugs*

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CVS Oil Free Eye Makeup Remover (dupe for Neutrogena brand)- meh. Does an okay job but it stung a little.

Nip+Fab Exfoliating Facial Pads - Loved these. Smell is good, soft and light. And they're not rough. The exfoliating comes from the glycolic acid, I believe. It did feel like there was a film on my skin but more of a protective one as opposed to that unclean feeling. Kinda cool.

Vasanti Enzymatic Face Cleanser - nice cleanser but way too harsh for my skin. It actually created bumps on my face. Not cool.

Simple Cleansing Micellar Water - meh. Does an okay job but it doesn't remove all makeup. It stings a bit on the eyes, too.

Montagne Jeunesse Cucumber Peel Off Mask - I've tried a bunch from this brand and this was just okay. The smell is super strong and I didn't see or feel any difference in my skin.

Skin Food 3-Step System - Egg White Pore Foam was a great cleanser. The Water Berry Serum felt super light and smelled great! The Miracle 10 Cream has a nice floral scent, moisturized very well, and it lasted all night. A great trio face care system.

 

DOES A BODY GOOD (OR NOT)

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Mitchell and Peach Body Cream - nice light cream, absorbs well. Smells TERRIBLE.

Albertini International Divine Skin Hydrator - this is  the first in-shower moisturizer I ever used. Loved it! Doesn't leave the shower too slippery and the moisture lasted all day.

Etude House "My Castle" Rose Hand Cream - AWESOME AWESOME! This is a nice thick hand cream. Very moisturizing and it smells just like fresh cut roses. I have a lot of good luck with Etude House products.

La Vanilla Body Butter - I think I talked about this in a PD/MEH/GFY post. The cream is nice but the smell is so artificial and kind of sickening. Their perfume is awesome but this stuff sucks.

NSpa Coconut Body Butter - the smell is very artificial but the cream itself is fantastic. My skin felt soft all day.

Schick Hydro Razor - the moisture strip surrounding the blades wears out really fast but it's still a decent razor.

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Bath and Body Works Vampire Blood Foaming Soap - I've kind of fallen in love with foaming hand soaps. Smells like plums but it's very sweet - might be off putting to some. (this was a limited edition Halloween scent but the link will take you to the rest of their foaming soaps)

Caress Body Wash - these are good body washes. This scent is very strong but it didn't seem overpowering.

Marc Anthony Oil of Morocco Hair Spray - at this point, I will never buy another hair spray besides this one. Light hold, smells fantastic. This is my 2nd or 3rd travel size. I get the full sized can, too.

Oil of Olay Body Wash - this was very nice. Soft scent and really hydrated my skin.

Bath and Body Works Sensual Body Wash - LOOOOOOOOVE this scent. I have another bottle just waiting for me.

 

Okay. That should do it for this installment. Tune in mid May (probably AFTER Comic Con) for the continuing saga of shit I've used up...

Morgue Drawer

It hasn't even been two months yet but I think I need to do this post. I had a lot of samples to talk about plus some regular every day crap. If I wait too much longer I might have to break this up into three posts! Heavens to Betsy!

Face and Eyeballs

Mario Badescu Eye Cream: I got a sample of this in one of my subscription bags. And it is awesome. So moisturizing, no crazy smell. Nothing will get rid of my smile lines (and why would I want them to go away?) but this cream is so nice to use. I also have a little dry patch near the corner of my eye and this stuff really helped diminish it - and nothing has worked that well before. Nothing.

Josie Moran Face Oil (Argan): This stuff smells fantastic. And my face felt so soft afterwards. But the foil packet totally failed so I couldn't get more than one use from it. *sadness ensued*

Burt's Bees Renewal Serum: I've talked about this before. This is my second bottle. Though I thought it was gentle enough to use twice a day, I noticed that my skin dries out if I do that. So I stick to night time use (though right now I haven't repurchased because I've got a bottle of ROC Retinol treatment to finish).

Ahava Purifying Mud Mask: This stuff was okay. It smelled rather strong, like a combination spa/herbal scent. It was also gritty so it felt a little rough on my face. It's definitely not as purifying as a Freeman mud mask I use. It also started to sting after I worked halfway through the tube.

Olay Tone Perfecting Cream Moisturizer: My skin felt like BUTTAH after using this. Unfortunately the sample size only allowed for one use and you can't really tell if it's working until after 8 weeks. So...there you go.

Origins GinZing Eye Cream: Does NOT depuff like it claims. "Brightens" is just a word these eye creams use because it has a shiny pearlized finish. It actually made my dark circles look worse.

Klorane Eye Patches: Arrrggghh! No, not those kind of eye patches. These were thick and soft under eye patches. They didn't really do anything but instead of sticking from being over saturated with essence, they had a gel like surface that clung to the skin. Kinda cool even if useless.

Sephora Honey Eye Mask: I had two of these (one I ordered and one I got in a beauty subscription, I think). The first set stung my skin but I wanted to try the second packet just in case that was a fluke. It was nicer the 2nd time and I left them on about 10 minutes longer. Nothing outstanding but nice.

 

Naked Time (aka body lotions)

Elite Therapeutics Body Cream: Smells quite a bit like the plastic tube it comes in but my skin felt really good. The softness lasted all day!

H20+ Sea Salt Hydrating Body Butter: Very nice! It wasn't greasy, smelled good, and the moisturizing lasted a long time.

H20+ Sea Amber Body Lotion: This stuff smelled great...at first (like citrus). But it quickly morphed into plastic. Does a great job at moisturizing, though.

DermaDoctor Brazillian Bombshell Body Lotion: This was probably my favorite sample of a body lotion. Very thick and moisturizing and lasted a long time. No scent. Left my skin with this glowy sheen - like a highlight for your body (not glitter - this is not stripper lotion). Maybe that's the skin perfecting element? Whatever. It's awesome.

Figs & Rouge Hand Cream: This was a sample I got in my very first Ipsy bag (back in October of 2014). Obviously I don't use the stuff regularly. I really liked it though. Kind of thin but did a decent job. The scent is Roseberry and that's exactly what it smells like - like a raspberry and a rose bush (heh) had a baby.

 

Gee, Your Hair Smells Terrific

Total Repair 5 Deep Conditioner: Did not like this crap. My hair was so greasy and weighed down. Terrible. Looking at the packaging, it seems it's the same stuff as the bottle but believe me, it isn't.

Total Repair 5 Conditioner: This stuff is all right. When I still had a lot of dry and damaged hair from bleaching, this and the shampoo seemed to help smooth it out. Just waiting to use up the shampoo to start another brand.

Batiste Dry Shampoo (Blush): I love this brand though the scents can be overwhelming. Blush is definitely better than the cherry scent. I've recently purchase the Original and Fresh scent so we'll see how those go. But the formula cannot be denied. Best one I've tried. I haven't lied. I seriously died. Check out my ride...okay, I'll stop.

Marc Antony Argan Oil Hairspray: I think this is my second can. I LOVE LOVE LOVE this stuff. Smells fantastic! It's a soft hold so my hair doesn't feel crunchy or stiff. If you're looking for super hold stuff, this is probably not the hairspray for you. Otherwise, you need to get this immediately.

 

*giant powderpuff to the face* (aka Make Up)

Benefit Eye Primer: Meh. The first time I used it, my eye shadow totally faded in a few hours. The second time I put powder over it before the shadow and then it worked a little better. But I'm glad I just had a sample so I don't have to fuck with it again. 

Benefit Roller Lash Mascara: I did like this mascara (keep in mind I had the sample size). It's supposed to hold a curl really well but I don't need to curl my lashes. They naturally curl up a little bit so most mascaras work like this one did on me. Maybe this curled them just a smidge more.

Neutrogena Healthy Lengths Mascara: I like the formula on this. My lashes looked very natural and it gave just a touch of volume. It layered pretty well with other mascaras, too. But the tube dried out really fast which was disappointing. I think I accidentally bought this twice so we'll see if that tube lasts a little longer.

RiRe Lash Essence: Got this is a 3B box. It's supposed to help thicken or grow your lashes. Yeah...not so much. It was just like putting some kind of clear gel on my lashes that ended up stuck together when I woke up in the morning.

Essence Lash Princess Mascara: I adore this mascara! It's great at giving my lashes volume and the natural bristle brush separates my lashes so well. This was at least my 2nd tube. And it's inexpensive! And how can you not love that packaging?

 

Randomness

Zicam Nasal Swabs: When it comes to cold medicines or remedies, Zicam is at the top of my list. There are lozenges, melts, chewables, and these swabs. Some people protested the swabs years ago because it affected their sense of smell - but I think that's because they didn't follow the directions that say DON'T SHOVE THIS ALL THE WAY UP YOUR NOSE. The oral stuff affects my taste and upsets my stomach so the swabs are perfect. 

Bath and Body Works Foaming Hand Soap: First scent was from the Halloween line - Purrfect Potion. It was supposed to smell like pumpkin and cinnamon but all I got was sugary sweet. The Sea Island Cotton scent, though, was great. Smelled very fresh and clean. Will definitely repurchase! (the Halloween scents are no longer available but their Christmas stuff is on sale plus they have a ton of other scents available in their regular line)

Sensodyne Extra Whitening Toothpaste: I believe in my last MD I said I wanted to try the extra whitening because the gentle whitening sucked. Yeah, this stuff works so much better. Already repurchased. It's also great for any kind of regular sensitivity you might have. It doesn't do much for the exposed nerve on my #29 tooth but nothing short of a composite filling would.

 

That wasn't too terribly long, was it? I think I prefer doing one longer post every two months instead of breaking it up into multiple posts once a quarter. Hopefully you'll like reading it that way, too. Feel free to post your thoughts!

Walmart Beauty Box - Winter 2015

The last subscription box I received for 2015 will be my first review for 2016! I got my Walmart Beauty Box about 2 weeks ago so it's given me some time to try out a few of the products. The benefits of being lazy...

Walmart has a seasonal beauty subscription service. Once a quarter you will receive a box filled with sample products of beauty, hair, skin care, and more for only $7 (per box). If you'd like to check them out, head on over to https://beautybox.walmart.com/ (as always, I purchase this with my own money and all opinions are my honest ones).

For the samples I think I may have tried all but the cotton swabs. You may be thinking that all swabs are the same but they're aren't! I learned that the hard way once so I'll have to let you know how awesome or craptacular the Swisspers brand is.

Olay Regenerist Luminous Tone Perfecting moisturizer. Yeah, this is one of those products that you see results after 2 months of use. So a one time foil packet isn't really going to do shit. It did fell really really nice on the skin though so maybe I'll go buy some and test it out. Jennifer Aniston has a perfume (in this day, though, who the fuck doesn't?) and the sample in here smelled really nice. Like a soft combo of floral and a little sweet. I might actually want to find some! The Centrum Vitamints chewable vitamins were pretty cool. The consistency is like those old school butter mints (which I love) and the flavor is spearmint. I hate swallowing pills so any chance to get chewables works for me!

Pure Silk Raspberry Mist shave cream was unbelievably thick. I got way too much from just one little squirt (ooooh dirty). I didn't smell the raspberry scent but it was a nice cream. NSpa body butter in coconut scent (in this day, though, what ISN'T coconut scented?) feels nice but the smell is a little artificial coconut candle smell. I'll keep trying it out though. The Pantene hair spray smells awesome! I've only used it once or twice so I can't judge it's holding power.

The only sample in there I COULDN'T try were the color chips from Clairol. It's a pretty cool little package to look at all the colors you can get to dye your hair but I'm off hair coloring for now. Still a neat idea though. The L'Oreal True Match card had a bunch of stickers with their color range on them that you could put on your skin to find your perfect color. None of them really matched me (which is probably why I don't use it anymore) but I loved the idea of it!

I got coupons for all (except NSpa, Pure Silk, Pantene, and Swisspers) as well as one for Women's Rogaine, L'Oreal True Match makeup, and Covergirl eye makeup (Star Wars themed stuff - of which I already own a couple things..SHUT UP).

Even if I don't end up liking or using some of the products I get in this box, I really enjoy getting it each season. There's such a variety of products inside that there's bound to be SOMETHING everyone can enjoy. And for $7 every three months, that's not a bad thing!