Ipsy April 2018

For those who may not know, Ipsy is a monthly subscription service. For $10 you get 4-5 sample sized (sometimes full sized) makeup, skin care, and hair care products along with a reusable makeup bag. Check them out here: IPSY

(I pay for this service with my own money and all opinions are my honest ones)

April's theme: Social Butterfly. Because yes, that's EXACTLY what the introvert in me wants.

Each month Ipsy creates a theme for the bag. While I hate them most of the time, this being no exception, the bag itself is so frakkin cute! The pink toned butterflies are pretty, the rose gold accents are beautiful, and that little card can go fuck itself. Don't ever count on that card to have useful information, by the way, unlike every other service out there. 

Anyway, let's get to the products. I'm pretty sure I'm excited about all these and mildly okay with one.

H20+ Oasis Hydrating Treatment: I want to say I've tried at least one product from this brand before thoughI can't remember for sure. But I'm excited to try this gel-like moisturizer. I've had good luck with all brands that come out with this kind of formula so I'm hopeful this will be amazeballs, too. Full size is $38 so this sample runs about $7.50. (I can't find ANY info on their cruelty free status so I've emailed them directly.)

Purlisse Coconut Oil and Coffee Sugar Body Scrub: I've used face products from Purlisse that can suck my dick but this body scrub is awesome. Gentle but effective exfoliation, the oil leaves your skin soft (it does coat your tub/shower so be careful of that!), and it smells divine. Not like sweetened coffee - just a good strong coffee scent. You can actually purchase this sample size tube on their site and it goes for $10. It's good for one use, though, and that's it. If you're bigger than me, it won't be enough (Says CF on their site but no other website backs that up).

Ciate London Starstruck Double Ended Stamp liquid liner (black): At first I thought the stamp was going to be wing shaped, which I would not be opposed to trying because the struggle to get a good wing on my eyes is real. But this is a star because it's festival season (Coachella - who outside of California fucking cares) so I was a little disappointed. However, it looks so cute on the face (don't mind the lines on the hand stamp - product got on the base of it but you can get a clean stamp if you're careful). So since the liner end works pretty well, nice and black, easy to use, I'll let the star stamp slide. This particular eye liner is not available on the Ciate or Ipsy site so it must be an exclusive. The link I provided is for their regular eyeliner and it goes for $18 (CF).

Paula Dorf Bronzer in Bora Bora: I seriously thought this was an eye shadow until I went to Ipsy to get info on the product. Whoops. But that just proves they always send bronze or browns or neutral shades all the time so it was easy to mistake this for eye shadow. That would explain why it's not too warm or cool a color. It's a nice neutral shade that should look nice on everyone (at least with fair skin). I only use a little bronzer, if at all, and I have 3 of them already so I might not keep this. It's a nice shade, though, and feels nice on the skin. Full size is $32 so this sample is about $6.50 (Says CF on their site but again, can't find confirmation anywhere).

Glamour Dolls Romantic Rose blending brush: Never mad to get a brush! And I think this has replaced my favorite Real Techniques brush for crease work. This is the perfect mix of precision shadow placement and blending. It's soft but not too soft, tapered to get the shadow right where you want it but doesn't plop down color that won't blend out. It's pretty perfect. Full size and is $5 (CF and Vegan).

Overall value runs about $47. Not too bad. I'm not completely surprised that I couldn't find CF status confirmation on several sites. A lot of brands are not well known and/or don't pay to have PETA or Leaping Bunny certify them. But it does leave me a little leery of what brands Ipsy is committed to working with for the bag each month. 

Ipsy February 2018

For those who may not know, Ipsy is a monthly beauty subscription service. For $10 you get 4-5 sample sized (sometimes full sized) makeup, skin care, and hair care products, as well as a reusable makeup bag. Check them out for yourself here: IPSY

(I purchase this service with my own money and all opinions are my honest ones)

The theme this month is "Unzipped". I think that's in reference to being naked (not necessarily physically) or our true form or WHO THE FUCKING JESUS GOD CARES? The bag is pretty cute so I'm hanging on to it for now. Let's get to the products.

PUR Fully Charged Mascara: I haven't tried this yet because I'm trying to Project Pan another mascara (plus I have another one from Catrice that's open). But the reviews look good. I love trying new mascaras. Full size is 15mls for $22, so this 4 mls mini is around $5.50. (CF)

Beaute Basics Eye Shadow in "Lavish": While this shadow is described as a warm, shimmery bronze, it looks more coppery on my skin. Which is fine because I'm sick of bronze shades. It's very soft so can kick up some powder but the pigmentation is nice. Haven't tried it on my eyes yet, though. This looks like a full sized pan (4g) and goes for $15 on the BB site. (NCF - so I'll probably donate it)

Mellow Cosmetics Liquid Precision Pen Eyeliner: I haven't tried this on my eyes, either, but the swatch looks nice and black! It didn't smudge after it dried, unless I put water on it. Pens can be a little tricky to work with as they can dry out fast or get covered in eye shadow and not work as effectively. This also looks full size and goes for $14. (CF)

Luxie Beauty Blending and Shading Eye Brush 249: I love getting brushes and I've enjoyed every Luxie Beauty one I've received. They are super soft but not flimsy. Since it's double sided, it's not available on Ipsy or LB's site (naturally). But it looks like a combo between the precision shader ($14) and the tapered blending ($12) brushes. So let's average that to a $13 value. (CF) 

Sand & Sky Pink Clay Mask: Now this stuff can go fuck right the fuck off. First of all, look at that picture. If you're gonna skimp on a sample then don't put it in a tube 4-times the size you need, asshats. Also, the package said it contains .45 ounces of product (the Ipsy site says .5). I cut that sucker open and weighed it. There was somewhere between .38 and .40 ounces (I used a titch on my face before it caught fire and I had to remove it, and whatever was left in the tube that I couldn't scrape out, which wouldn't be usable product anyway). I don't know how much is in a full sized jar but it goes for $49. I'd say this sample is worth $1, if even that much. (CF)

Overall, the value is around $47 (I'm not counting the clay mask because fuck that shit). So even without that this ain't too bad!

Ipsy January 2018

All righty. Here we are, 2018, new year, new Ipsy bag, same lame ass non-info card bullshit...

For those who may not know, Ipsy is a monthly subscription service. For $10, you'll get 4-5 sample (sometimes full) sized makeup, hair, skin care products, and a reusable makeup bag. Check them out here: IPSY

(I pay for this service with my own money and all opinions are my honest ones)

January's theme is Game Face, I think. To be honest, I usually throw away the card the second I take it out of the bag. It's covered in bullshit platitudes, heavy handed 'inspirational' crap, and I can hardly believe it but I'm sure it's even smaller than last year. To play devil's advocate with myself, they're probably saving $$ by not making it larger and are able to get companies like The Balm, Ole Henriksen, and other well-known brands to get their products in here. But still....SO FUCKING WEAK.

The bag is an absolute hideosity. I just can't even...the contrasting colors are so 80s, which might be on trend but as a child of that era, I don't ever wanna see it again! However, I'm digging the products this month!

Absolute New York Eye Artist Single Shadow (Posse): This shadow is soft but not crumbly, decently pigmented, and does look very pretty on the eye. It swatches like a warm orange/brown but it's actually a rose-taupe color. It's nothing super special so I'll probably donate it. Looks full size and goes for $5. (their website says CF but I can't find any corroboration on that from my cruelty free resources so...?)

The Balm Mary-Lou Manizer: I've tried quite a few products from this brand through Ipsy and I've been satisfied with most. I've never tried this cult favorite and now I can! Though I hate the size of their samples (sometimes the small pans are difficult to work with) I'm usually happy to get something from them. I'm sort of okay with Mary-Lou. It's described as a warm honey color but it looks more light gold. Can look like a wet, high-shine accent on the skin, which is nice. In some light, though, I can see all the sparkle (mirco glitter, at least, and not giant chunks). So I do and don't like it. When I'm in the mood to look like a micro fairy jizzed on my face, I'll probably reach for this. Full size is $24 so this 1g sample is around $3. (CF)

Cake by Cake Beauty Heavenly Cream Intensive Body Balm: I still have 2 or 3 other lotions from Cake Beauty but they are all different formulas! This stuff smells fantastic and absorbs well. It's 20% shea butter and also contains aloe and camellia leaf extract. I look forward to smelling like vanilla frosting for the next 6 months. Mmmm...frosting (disclaimer: don't be an asshole and eat lotion. That's just dumb.) Full size goes for $22 so this 1 ounce sample runs around $4.50. (CF)

Ole Henriksen Banana Bright Eye Cream: Holy hell the website claims this eye cream can do ALL THE THINGS - brighten, reduce dark circles, firm, instantly reduce the appearance of fine lines and wrinkles, and is great for under concealer. Then there's a long list of data including lots of "100%" and asterisks and on and on. Personally that comes off as trying too hard but that's just me. The first time I tried it, it felt thick and sticky and didn't brighten anything. BUT it did feel moisturizing and it absorbed rather quickly for such a thick cream. I thought it would be too heavy under concealer but damn if the Tarte Shape Tape didn't look great! If nothing else, at least it'll provide some moisture during this frigid winter season! Full size is $38 so this teeny sample is maybe $7.50. (CF)

SLMISSGLAM L36 Tapered Highlight Brush: I love getting brushes. And I'm not usually a girly-girl, but the pink glittery handle on this is adorbs. The synthetic bristles are super soft and it works perfectly with the Mary-Lou Manizer highlight sample! Apparently it works with powders, creams, and liquids but...because it's kind of flimsy, I'm not so sure about that. I'll have to test it out. Full size. This brush is not available on the SLMISSGLAM site (which actually makes me want to throw up it's such a pastel rainbow unicorn glitter shit show) so it may be an Ipsy exclusive. I've linked the closest looking set of 6 brushes which goes for $80. So maybe this brush is around $13. (CF)

All told this bag is around a $33. Not terrible but I've had bags that are upwards of $50-$70 so it's kinda weak. However, I do think I'll get a lot of use out of the products this months so it's still a win for me!

Ipsy December 2017 Review

The end of 2017 is upon us. And so is my last Ipsy review for the year. For those who don't know, Ipsy is a monthly subscription service. For $10 you receive 4-5 sample (sometimes full) sized makeup, skin, and hair care products. Check it out here: IPSY

(I pay for this service with my own money and all opinions are my honest ones)

I guess the theme this month is Snow Globe, whatever the fuck that's supposed to mean. Who cares anyway? The bag, though, is awesome. It looks like some kind of fancy clutch you'd take to a party or something. So yeah, that's a keeper. Let's see what's inside this month!

The Chok Chok Green Tea Watery Cream: Doesn't sound to great, does it? Who wants their creams watery? But, according to the on-line description, this is supposed to be a great gel based moisturizing cream with 63% fermented green tea extract (instead of water). I do like the gel based ones. They're kiind of cool. Haven't tried this and I probably won't because Tony Moly is not cruelty free. Full size is $25 so this sample should run around $4. (NCF)

Nip + Fab Dragon's Blood Fix Pumping Serum: I love the glycolic cleansing pads from N+F so when I got this in my bag, I was pumped! No pun intended. Haven't opened it yet because I've still got half a bottle of The Ordinary buffet serum to use up. Full size is $20 so this sample is worth about $8. (CF)

Luxie Beauty Precision Shader Onyx Brush 239: I'm never mad at brushes, y'all. This is a nice compact shader with a slight taper to it. It really can put shadow RIGHT in the crease. It's not as good at blending that color out if you got too precise and heavy with a shadow so keep that in mind. This is full size and is valued at $14. The link is to their Rose Gold style - the black handle might be an Ipsy exclusive. Not sure. (CF)

Pixi by Petra Mesmerizing Mineral Duo in Orchid Ornament: I've never tried Pixi shadows before. I've heard mixed reviews so I've never wanted to spend the money on them. They're not high end pricing but they're not drug store either. These are two very soft and beautiful shades. They actually seem different in the pan compared to on the skin. I can't quite put my finger on it! You can see in the swatches that these shades can be built up but for my eye look, I just powdered my eyelid and swept a little of each color on (the gold on the lid and the dark rosy brown in the crease). These particular shades aren't available on the Pixi website (again, might be exclusive to Ipsy) and the mesmerizing minerals only come in 6-pan palettes. But they all look really pretty! Full size is $12 so this little duo is probably around $3. (CF)

NYX Faux Blacks Eyeliner in Obsidian: I actually own two other colors in this line. They're not great (one is Oxblood, the other is Olive but I kept the red one because I have no other color like it) so I was a little bummed about getting this. AT FIRST. Boy was I wrong about Obsidian. First, you'd think the name would indicate it's black but it's actually a dark, dark blue. Second, I've never encountered an eyeliner that stayed on my tight line and waterline as long as this one. MAYBE the Urban Decay 24/7 came close. So holy fuck me I love this pencil. It goes on super creamy so it wears down very fast. But I can live with that! This is full size and goes for $8. (CF)

Total bag value is around $37. Not too bad considering only one of the items isn't cruelty free and I'm stoked for everything else, including the bag. Nice little holiday wrap up (heh, see what I did there?) for 2017. Hope you all have a wonderful, safe, and happy holiday! See you in 2018.

Ipsy October/November 2017 Review

Well, as per usual, October got away from me. So instead of completely skipping that month's reviews, I thought I'd do some combo work. So let's get October and November together and have us a baby! A review baby, that is...

For those who don't know, Ipsy is a monthly subscription program. For $10 you get 4-5 sample sized (sometimes full) products of makeup, hair, and skin care. Check them out here: IPSY

(I pay for this service with my own money and all opinions are my honest ones)

OCTOBER

October's theme was something like The Power of Change. And while I absolutely ABHOR their themes each month, I have to say I love the saying on the small useless card that comes with the bag. This one made me giggle. Also there won't be a lot of pics because there wasn't much to swatch!

It Cosmetics Bye Bye Pores Pressed Powder: I've wanted to try IT for a long time but the brand can be pretty expensive. And I really don't like to drop a lot of money on something that could possibly suck major ass. HOWEVER, this powder is infused with alchemy or dark magic or something. I put this on and my skin never looked smoother (and I have pores the size of Nebraska). It's also great for under eye concealer setting - doesn't make my nearly half a century aged skin look like a full century. And that pisses me off because now I have to buy it!! Be warned - it is very soft and crumbles easily. Full size is $29 so this 3g sample is just under $10. (CF)

Context Vitamin C All Day Eye Cream: Honestly, I haven't even opened this yet. I have a couple creams going right now but they are almost empty. Once they are, I'll give this guy a shot. From the Context website: "A revitalizing and hydrating lightweight formula contains a powerful combination of preventative botanicals. Keeps eyes protected and nourished with potent antioxidants to protect the delicate area against free radical damage. Leaves skin nourished and refreshed all day." This is a full sized tube and costs $35. (CF)

Smashbox Photo Finish Lid Primer: At first I thought this brand was still NCF but as of 2017, they no longer sell in China and do NOT test their products on animals where required by law. So that's cool! This is also another brand that's on the expensive side so I usually don't purchase from them. But this was a nice way to try the lid primer people go ape shit for. Though I don't know why. It's thick and sticky (here we go...) so it needs to be set first. Even so, my eye shadows still looked kind of patchy and they didn't last any longer. In fact they looked more faded and blended into one color than what usually happens with my Milani eye primer. So I might keep using it, I might pitch it. Depends on my mood. I know I ain't buying the full size at $21. This sample was worth $5.25. (CF)

Hey Honey Active Propolis Cream Concealer: I did like a peel off mask from the brand once, long ago. But this stuff is pretty crap. First the color is a touch too dark and yellow for me and it looks REALLY dry under the eyes. Doesn't do a great job at concealing spots on the face either. Full size goes for $36 so this 8mls sample is just about $19. (CF)

Forgive my dry crepey centuries old looking mummy hand...eeeesh.

Blaq Mask: I do love face masks, in all their forms. I haven't had a chance to try this but look at that color! (see pic above). It's also a peel off mask, mostly aimed at the blackheads and gunk around the nose. But I bet you can use it anywhere. If you've never tried a peel off mask, there are plenty on the market. And they're so fun. The full size on this costs $29. The sample I got should run around $7.25. (CF)

UPDATE: I've tried this mask twice. And while it's fun, it initially leaves the skin red and irritated but that does fade over a few hours. I also broke out with fresh zits after each use. So......no. It's going away now.

All right, October. The bag value is about $76.50. Holy shitzies (I stole that from thataylaa on YT). And all the products are Cruelty Free brands. SCORE!

NOVEMBER

November's theme is who cares. I'm torn on the bag right now. I'm not a bronze and yellow kinda gal (though it's close to the brown and gold colors of my alma mater, Valparaiso - GO CRUSADERS!). I'm still thinking about keeping it.

Benefit They're Real Mascara: Benefit isn't a cruelty free brand so I won't be using this. I don't think I've ever tried anything from Benefit, even before I started paying attention to CF stuff. *shrug* (Oh wait - their Porefessional primer. Made me break out. Fuck 'em.) Full size is $24 so this sample is about $8.50. (NCF)

Colourpop Pressed Eyeshadow in Come and Get It: Anyone who's read my one-brand review of Colourpop knows I love the brand. And, naturally, I already own this eye shadow. It's gorgeous, a "duochrome rose with a gold flip". I own about a dozen of their pressed shadows and they've all been very good. This is no exception. This is full size and goes for $5. (CF)

The White Company White Lavender Body Lotion: I just opened this tube so I could at least give my first thoughts on it. There is a nice lavender scent but underneath it there's something...grassy. Must be the vetiver. Kinda weird. But it absorbs really fast and my hands aren't greasy. Huh. If the scent lingers too long or it's too overpowering for the hubby, I might just donate it. Can't really find any info on the cruelty free status of this company but it's based in London and I believe it's illegal to test on animals in Europe. The full size is $20 so this sample goes for $4 (CF...?)

Manna Kadar Perfection Powder: I've had MK items before and I think they've been hit and miss. This powder is actually super nice. It's a lot like the It Cosmetics powder I got last month...way to switch things up, Ipsy (*sarcasm*). Full size is $29 but I can't find any info on how much is in the full size. This looks similar to the It Cosmetics sample so let's just price is out the same at $10. (CF)

Make Beauty Cream Luminous Lip Gloss in Abalone: I believe I've received a thing or two from Make before in Ipsy but I'd have to go back and look because I just can't remember. This is a nice gloss. Not sticky, decent amount of color (for a gloss), and feels very comfortable. Nice nude color, too. Got a weird ass applicator, though, that makes it difficult to apply neatly. Plus it's very...phallic. Not that that's a BAD thing. Full size is $25 but again, can't find total product weight so let's give this sample about $8. (CF)

Give or take a few bucks to adjust for guesstimates on sample value, $36 is okay. Let's see what December has in store for us.

Ipsy August 2017 Review

For those who don't know, Ipsy is a monthly beauty subscription service. For $10, you get 4-5 sample (sometimes full) sized hair, skin, and makeup products to try out each month. Check them out here: IPSY

I pay for this service with my own money and all opinions are my honest ones.

The theme this month is Good Vibes Only. And I'll tell you right now I don't get good vibes off this when they include an itty bitty theme card and a GIGANTIC catalog for their new Ipsy Cash program but do NOT include an info card on the products. In fact, it makes me furious. So you can afford to put together this huge catalog, on thick stock paper, glossy, full color, but you can't be bothered to tell me about the five little products? You and your theme can eat a bag of dicks, Ipsy.

Now, they may only be doing this GINORMOUS catalog once to introduce the program and that's cool. But if it shows up again next month, I'm gonna start throwing elbows.

The bag this month has some pretty colors on it (there were 3 versions created) though I would have preferred the one with more red because...red. But this is cool. It's also made of a thick vinyl so if you travel with spillable liquids, this might make a good containment system!

Crown Medium Face Contour Brush: I don't contour but the beauty of brushes is that almost all created can be multi-taskers (Alton Brown would be so happy). This one will probably be a great blush brush. And I am NEVER mad at getting brushes, especially ones so frickin' soft! This is full size and goes for $7 (CF perhaps - lots of conflicting info. These are synthetic brushes so they probably ARE CF but no guarantees)

Air Repair Skincare Super Hydrating Eye Cream: I've only used this once (after I mucked up an eye look and had to start over so the makeup wipe irritated my under eye). It's a good thickness, absorbed quickly, and moisturized really well. I'm not into under eye creams anymore but I do like them for before I apply concealer or eye makeup and my under eye is dry and irritated. Helps product go on much more smoothly. This sample of 5mls costs around $7.50 (CF according to their website but none of the other sites I check include them so...?)

Aurora Pro Color Corrector in Pistachio: I don't have a ton of redness on my face so these green correctors aren't that useful. But I tried it anyway on the little bit I have around my nose and cheeks. It ended up looking like a full-on Monet (gold star to anyone who knows what movie I stole that from BEFORE checking the link I provided). It looked really dry when I got up close in the mirror, though the product felt nice and creamy going on. Oh well. Their full sized concealer tubes go for $8 so this is perhaps half the size? Can't tell because there's no amount info on the website but it's a decent sized sample so let's go with $4. (No info on CF status anywhere)

Seraphine Botanicals Liquid Coal Waterproof Liquid Liner: I got the blush last month from this brand and I love it. This seems to be a nice black liquid liner that allows you to make a thin or thick line. It didn't bleed into the wrinkles on my skin either. I didn't make a wing with it but on the eyelids directly it didn't smudge or break down. And when it came time to remove it, no problem! I don't like waterproof stuff because it's so hard to get off (heh) but this was a breeze. This is full sized and goes for $22. (CF)

TheBalm Voyage Vol. 2 Highlighter in Kuwakaribisha: Ipsy says this is an eye shadow but TheBalm website includes this shade as their highlighter in the Voyage Vol 2 palette. So I'll go with TheBalm on this one. However, it does makes a great eye shadow! It's super pigmented and reflective as all fuck. Looks gorgeous on the eye as well as the face. I just wish the sample was bigger! I've valued this same sample size pan for their eye shadows in the past so I'll do the same for this highlighter and give it $1.50. (CF)

So give or take a few bucks the value of the bag is about $42. No too shabby! 

Ipsy July 2017 Review

Okay, I have to admit the bag really got me this month. So much so that I don't even care* how fucking useless the theme/card is all the time.

For those who don't know, Ipsy is a monthly beauty service. For $10 a month, you get 4-5 sample (sometimes full) sized beauty, skin, and hair products, along with a reusable makeup bag. Check them out here: IPSY

I pay for this service with my own money and all opinions are my honest ones.**

I think the theme had something to do with lazy summer days or some shit. I don't know who Gudetama is (another Internet sensation of which I'm completely unaware) but OMG look at that egg yolk's cute little butt! I literally (in the classic-and-should-be-the-only definition of the word) squealed with delight. It's a keeper for sure. Now, on to the products.

Ahava Mineral Hand Cream: I've received a few products from this brand before. While they've all been just okay, this hand cream is probably the nicest. It smells fantastic - but very floral. If that bothers you, you'll hate this. It's thin so it absorbs quickly but the skin feels silky afterwards, not greasy. Full size is $24. This travel sized tube is valued at $10. (NCF - some mixed info but no corroborating evidence of CF on any of the research sites I check)

IBY Crease Eye Shadow Brush: Inspired By You Beauty (pronounced I.B.Y.). This is supposed to be a domed shadow brush, great for blending out darker shadows on the eye. The cut on mine looks kinda wonky - not an even domed shape. Not sure if that's how it's supposed to be. It is very soft, synthetic, and 100% vegan. Full size valued at $12. (The brush is vegan so you have to think they're a cruelty free company but I can't find any info on their site or on any of the websites that compile CF company info.)

Ciate London Wonderwand Gel-Khol Hybrid Liner in Black: The claim is this has the pigmentation of a gel liner but the blendability of a khol pencil. And I would agree. I tried this on for shits and giggles without eye primer, over eye shadow, to see how it would work. It lasted longer that the eye shadow and didn't fade at all. The outer wing did lighten a little, which isn't surprising on my oily lids, but unless you were all up in my business, you never would have known. The brush is a titch scratchy but nothing terrible. I can't tell if this is full sized or not, but if not it's darn close. Full size is $18 so I'll call this item $15, just to be safe. (CF)

Seraphin Botanicals Lychee + Gold Healthy Glow Rose Gold Blush: (geez there's lot of long named shit this month). GORGINA blush color. Beautiful blend of peach and pink with a soft glow. Almost enough to forgo a highlighter. Almost...It kicks up a ton of powder but it's surprisingly not very pigmented, which I prefer. Easier to work with. This is full sized and goes for $14 (Vegan and CF)

Ofra Cosmetics Eyeshadow in Gold Rush: I've heard sooooo much about this brand and now I finally get to experience it for myself! Though I'm bored to tears with yet another warm universal gold/copper color, it is rather nice. I didn't use a primer to test it out and the color payoff was pretty dang good. And I didn't wet it, which is how it really shines, I guess, since it is a metallic. So I'm excited to play with it some more. Full size, 4g, is $12 so this 2g sample costs $6 (Vegan and CF)

I've come up with a $57 value this month. Holy schnikies. Ipsy hasn't had that good of a value for a while now. And I do actually like everything this month!

*That's a lie. I still care and still get pissy about it.

** I hate that I have to put this disclaimer in the post because people in general assume if you review something positively, it's because you're being paid to do it. Fucking weak.

Ipsy June 2017 Review

For those who may not know, Ipsy is a monthly subscription service. For $10, you will received 4-5 sample (sometimes full sized) makeup, hair, and skin care products along with a reusable makeup bag. Check them out here: IPSY

(I pay for this service with my own money and all opinions are my honest ones)

This month's theme is whatever-who-fucking-cares month. The bag is really cute, though. Canvas on the outside with a nylon lining. I dig it. Let's get into the products, shall we?

Delectable Coconut and Cream Triple Moisture Body Lotion: (by Cake Beauty) I liked the lemon hand cream I got before much better than this. This is very lightweight and absorbs quickly, which is nice. But when I got my Ipsy bag, the second I opened the bubble pack I was smacked in the face with a coconut scent. The tube was still capped and sealed, nothing was broken or torn. But the scent just permeated EVERYTHING. Not very happy about that. I like coconut but dayum. Full size is 8 ounces so this 2 ounce size is valued around $3.50. (CF and Vegan)

Doucce Maxlash Volumizer Mascara (black): I can't report on this yet because I have about 5 open mascaras already. Didn't want to open this just yet. But I love trying new mascaras! Full size goes for $22 (can't seem to find the amount and a lot of mascaras hold between 7mls and 11 mls). So let's say this one is about 8mls so this travel size of 6 mls costs about $16.50 (CF)

Vasanti Cosmetics Power Oils Lip Gloss in Super Mom: Love love love this lip gloss. I'm actually a bit tired of matte lipstick (not that I will stop wearing it, of course) but with summer in full swing, it's nice to switch things up. Super pigmented, not sticky at all, long lasting, this color is gorgeous and will probably look good on almost everyone. Full sized, this gloss goes for $22 - though it's on sale right now for $19. (CF)

TheBalm Cosmetics Balm Springs Blush: I do like getting products from TheBalm. I've really enjoyed a lot of their makeup. This blush is a gorgeous neutral rosy shade. Look very natural, at least on my pasty ass skin. My only issue is the samples they use are so small they're hard to work with. Very difficult to get an even brush full of powder. Still nice though! Full size (5.5g) is $21 so this 1g sample is probably around $4. (CF)

Beauty for Real I-LINE 27-7 Eyeliner in Chocolate Fix: While I admit this color is really nice (sometimes it's hard to find a brown that's neutral or cool toned) the lasting power is for shit. Tightlined with it and within 5 minutes it was gone. It lasted a tad longer on the actual eye lids. Fucking weak. I doubt I'll be reaching for this very often. This is full sized and goes for $14. (I assume CF because the founder works with the SPCA - that'd be MAJOR hypocritical if the brands wasn't CF, yes?).

Wow, the value of this bag is around $57 (give or take a few bucks due to my mathematical prowess). That's not too shabby!

Ipsy May 2017 Review

For those who may not know, Ipsy is a monthly beauty subscription. For $10 a month, you receive 4-5 sample (sometimes full sized) makeup, skin, and hair products. Check them out for yourself here: IPSY

(I pay for this service with my own money and all opinions are my honest ones)

The theme for this month is USELESS. And if you can believe it, the card is even smaller than last time and has even LESS information on it. What. The hell.

I have to admit, though, I kinda like the bag. It's a clear thick plastic that will probably be decent at holding liquids while traveling (NOTE: I've used this a couple of times now and yes, it's good so far). And who doesn't like ice cream? COMMIES, THAT'S WHO.

The little bottle of lotion was an extra I got for cashing in some points. My profile said the points would expire in February so I wanted to hurry up and use them before they disappeared. Soon after I redeemed this little baby, the pop up info told me that the remaining points actually don't expire until 2018. Son of a bitch. The lotion is...okay. Scent is a bit overpowering.

Okay. Now for the actual monthly products:

Global Beauty Care Charcoal Wash Off Mask - stung a little but sometimes that happens with a new mask. I love the twisty top that allows me to seal it back up so the rest of the product doesn't dry out! I can't find a lot of info on them so I'm not sure if they're CF. But I think this is full sized and goes for $5.

Pacifica Beauty Island Life Eye Shadow - I've received a few makeup items from this brand before. I really have enjoyed past eye shadows and these are just as gorgeous. Pretty pigmented but VERY soft so be careful when you want to finger (swatch) them. This palette is exclusive to Ipsy so I have no idea how much it's worth. (CF)

Royal & Langnickel Precision Angled Brush - I've heard a lot about this brand floating around the internets so I was excited to get one in my bag. But...I don't know what to do with it. I don't contour; it's too big for eyes; it's too small for blush. So, yeah. Again, can't find this exact brush on their site so I don't know the cost. But it's vegan so that makes it CF.

Manna Kadar Radiance Split Pan Highlighter/Bronzer Duo - While the sample is a little small to work with, the colors are beautiful. The bronzer will be a better eye shadow on me and the highlight is pretty. Again, can't find any damn info on sizes/amounts but I know it's not full  size (which is $21). It is CF though!

Mellow Cosmetics Creamy Matte Lipstick in Posh: I've never heard of this brand before so I'm glad I get to try something new! This lipstick is awesome. Gorgeous color that is more neutral/cool than warm, goes on smooth, and lasts quite a while without being drying. It's my favorite product this month! Mostly because I'm a lipstick whore. Full size and it's $13 (CF).

Well, I don't really have a value for the bag this month because there just isn't any info out there about some of the items. But I'm pretty sure it's over $10. Though I need to use the mask a few more times to be sure about whether or not it'll fry my face, I'm pretty happy with the rest of the items (even if I can't figure out price points).

Ipsy February 2017 Review

For those who don't know, Ipsy is a monthly subscription service. For $10 you get 4-5 sample (sometimes full) sized beauty, skin, and hair care products. Check them out here: IPSY

I pay for this service with my own money and all opinions are my honest ones.

This month's COMPLETELY USELESS theme is #ipsymuchlove or something. WHO CARES? The bag feels like denim, which I loathe, and the orange trim just makes me want to gag. That said, however, I like what's inside!

Luxie Beauty Rose Gold Blush Brush 514: I love brushes. The more you have the less often you have to wash them...lazy, I know. This brush is soft and fluffy so it would be great for those super pigmented blushes that go on crazy from one tap of the pan. Full size and worth $18. (CF and vegan)

The Organic Pharmacy Lip & Eye Cream: Never mad at an eye cream, especially one that doubles as moisture/care for the lips, too. Not sure I want to put that kind of multitasker on my mouth but I'm willing to try. Especially since it's formulated by homeopathic doctors so it SHOULDN'T be a risk to ingest it, right?? Dubious Peggy is dubious. Apparently this 10ml tube is full size and goes for $48. (CF)

MOR Rosa Noir Hand & Body Milk: While I'm not so sure this lotion is all that great (put some on and a couple hours later my hands were dry and flaky - and I hadn't washed them at all), the scent is intoxicating! Rose, hibiscus, and fig. It smells good enough to eat and/or wear as a perfume. They suggest slathering this on the hands and putting cotton gloves on overnight so I might try that to see how it works. 17 ounce full size is $36 so this 1 ounce sample is around $2. (CF but may sell in China)

Elizabeth Mott Whatup Beaches Matte Bronzer: I don't bronze all that often. If it's the middle of winter or my foundation is a bit too pale, sure, I'll throw some on. And the color on this is perfect - neutral and matte. HOWEVER, the sample size just fits an eye shadow brush so I won't be using this as a bronzer. It's a great eye shadow, though. 8g is $25 so this .07g sample is probably just under $3. (CF)

NYX Butter Lipstick in Lifeguard: NYX is one of my favorite makeup brands. And these lipsticks are beautiful, creamy, and comfortable. Though the tube itself made me think this would be a brown shade, it's a nice deep red that is absolutely gorgeous! Not that I don't already have enough red lippies....THERE'S NO SUCH THING AS TOO MANY REDS!! Full size - $6 but they're having a 40% off sale now! (CF)

Holy crap this bag is worth about $77. Pretty awesome!

Ipsy January 2017 Review

As far as this subscription goes, 2017 is not off to bang up start. Yes, first world problems, I know. For those who are new here, Ipsy is a monthly subscription service. For $10 each month, you'll receive 4-5 sample sized (sometimes full) makeup, beauty, and skin care products. Check them out here: IPSY

I pay for this service with my own money and all opinions are my honest ones.

The theme for this month is Metropolis or some ridiculous bullshit. Whatever. The bag is...odd. I'm not sure how I feel about it yet. It's a soft plastic with a grey satin finish. The holed outer sheath over a solid bag is rather interesting. Definitely the most unique one so far. The products themselves are okay.

Crown Brush Beaute Basics C405 Contour Blush Brush: Whew, that's a mouthful. I love Crown Brushes. Super soft, the handle is ergonomically designed, and it's cruelty free. I don't contour but this works great as a blush/bronzer brush for me. Full size this goes for $7.50. If you need brushes but don't want to spend a shit ton of money, I recommend this brand! (CF)

Temptu Base Smooth & Matte Primer: Again with the airbrush products. Granted, you can use their stuff without one but the design of the bottle makes it a little more difficult. I'm not sure how this one works yet so I'm excited to find out. Full size is $35 for 1 ounce so this 1/4 ounce sample is approximately $8.75. (Site claims CF status but they sell to China).

Clarisea Instant Glow Lavendar Powder Exfoliant: I don't know about you guys but I really don't want to put a SALT scrub on my face. I've used sugar ones before, mixed with honey and oil, but that's as rough as I like to get on my face (wow...dirty). So I don't imagine I will be using this at all. Plus the top is cracked and the safety seal came off in the top like it had already separated from the jar. Um...no. Full size at 5 ounces is $14. This 1 ounce sample goes for $2.80. (CF)

TheBalm Bahama Mama Bronzer/Shadow/Contour Powder: I've always wanted to try this product because the beauty community on YouTube goes APE SHIT for it. I do love the brand so I was double excited to get this. Unfortunately as you can see from the swatch, this basically looks like a mustard based poop stain on my skin. Ick. It does blend out nicely so it's not terrible but I don't think I'll be turning to this for bronzing again. I don't contour so maybe I'll try is as an eye shadow. Full size (7 grams) goes for $20 so this .5 gram should be somewhere around $1.50. (CF)

Manna Kadar Cosmetics 3-in-1 Fantasy Eye Shadow: Apparently this can work as an eye shadow, blush, or highlighter (hence the 3-in-1 claim). The swatch doesn't do it justice. It looks like a champagne light tan gold but if you turn a little it definitely had a rose gold vibe to it. It's pretty pigmented and soft. It comes in one shade that's supposed to be good for all skin tones. Full size is $19 but can't find any pan amounts. I did find the travel size on Amazon, which is the same as what I've got, so it's worth $7. (CF)

This whole bag is about $27.50. Not a super value, Ipsy. I really only like the Crown brush and the Manna Kadar shadow. *le sigh* Perhaps February will be better. 

Ipsy December 2016 Review

Almost end of the year, folks. Where the FUCK did 2016 go? Personally, I'm happy to see it leave.

For those who don't know, Ipsy is a monthly subscription service. For $10 every month you'll get sample (sometimes full) sized beauty, hair, and skin products in a reusable make-up bag. Check them out here: IPSY

I pay for this service with my own money and all opinions are my honest ones.

This month's theme is Carpe P.M. Have I mentioned how much I LOATHE these fucking useless themes? That said, the bag is kind of adorable. At first I was hesitant but the fuzzy deep fuschia wine colored bag is growing on me! Also the products look pretty fucking sweet.

Mint Pear beauty sponge: I adore makeup sponges. They make foundation look flawless and they're also great for smoothing out concealer or any other cream product. Even nice to tamp down too much highlighter (is there such a thing as too much highlighter??). I haven't used this yet but even dry it feels soft enough. It looks full size which is valued at $20. (CF)

UPDATE: I just used this the other day and it SUUUUUCKS. It does not absorb water like it's supposed to and felt like I beat myself up with rock when I tried to apply foundation. 

Make Beauty moonlight primer: I've never seen a primer start out looking like the black ooze that's usually involved with alien abductees. This product claims to protect the skin against High Energy Visible light and Infra Red light - both which apparently fuck your shit up in the premature aging department. It feels super light and absorbs quickly. Haven't used it as a primer yet so I'll let you know. 1 fl. ounce goes for $55 so this .1-ish ounce should cost around $5.50. (CF) This company also donates 10% of its sales to We See Beauty foundation. Cool.

Tarte Cosmetics Tarteist Glossy Lip Paint in WCW: I love Tarte cosmetics, man. So anytime I get something in one of my bags I'm happy. The formula on this lip paint is smooth, not sticky at all. The color is fucking gorgeous! That said, though, it is streaky (which you can see in the hand swatch) and dark glossy lip products just love those crevices around my lips. I can use a lip liner with this but I'm less likely to reach for this because of those two factors. Full size is $20 so this sample is worth around $3. (CF)

Cake Beauty heavy cream intensive hand repair balm: This stuff smells like straight up vanilla cake. So delicious! And it's a super thick hand cream that works pretty dang well. And now is the time of year for this kind of treatment! Full size costs $22 so this sample should be valued around $6.50. (CF - and Canadian!)

NYX Prismatic eyeshadow in Punkheart: I love NYX and I love their prismatic eyeshadows. These little pans of almost duochrome wonderfulness are super pigmented and blend out like a dream. I have Frostbite already so I'm excited to add this gorgeous plumy purple shade to my collection. This is full size and goes for $6.

Overall looks like this bag is worth somewhere around $41. Not too bad. Yes, I've had higher valued bags but I don't think I've been as happy with all the products like this. Nice way to end the year, Ipsy! And with all cruelty free companies. Hooray! Now PLEASE start making cards with product info already. Maybe that can be your New Year's resolution, m'kay?

Ipsy November 2016 Review

Holy crap this month snuck up on me! When I got that pink envelope in the mail I was completely unprepared. Usually I feel like I've been waiting for months and months for it to show up...

Anyway, for those who may not know, Ipsy is a monthly subscription service. For $10 you get sample (sometimes full) sized beauty, skin, and hair care products in a reusable make up bag. Check them out here: IPSY

(I purchase this service with my own money and all opinions are my honest ones)

The theme this month is Rock Starlet, whatever the FUCK that's supposed to mean. OMG so useless! The bag is kinda cute, though. It's made of that neoprene squishy material which is cool. The little star zipper pull is also cute. But the products this month literally made me gasp out loud. Except the first one so let's get that out of the way.

Pur-Lisse blue lotus balancing moisturizer: I got an eye cream from this brand before and it stung like a mother fucker. Even the lip balm I got last month stings a bit. So I'm not happy to put more of their acid on my fucking face. I'll try to be brave but don't hold your breath. Full size is $55 for 1.7 ounces (fuck off) so this .5 ounce sample is probably around $18. (CF)

Eyeko Skinny liquid eyeliner deluxe in Black: I have heard so many great things about this brand so imagine my excitement when I got a sample of their liquid liner! I forgot to take a swatch pic but it's super black and dried very quickly with no smudging. Update: It's not that black on the eyeball and it does break down in the wing part, when I draw one obvi. But it can be layered without crumbling or looking like crap. The 2g full size is $18 so this 1.2 gram is just about $9. (CF)

Absolute New York Matte Stick in Dark Red: I love me some red lipstick! I tried to swatch it on my lips but with my new bite splint it looked kind of goofy (yes, I simply could have removed it but I just put it in and fuck you, it's my mouth!). But the swatch on my hand is GORGEOUS! The angle of the bullet is nice but it's not tapered so application is a bit messy. It dries down to look matte but does not feel drying at all. It's very comfortable. And it smells like candy! Not transfer proof, though, so keep that in mind! It looks full size which is $6. (CF)

Tarte Maracuja Oil: I'm not opposed to face oils and this one has had a lot of hype. With winter coming, I'm going to need extra moisturizing. This product, supposedly, also brightens and smooths skin's texture. It can also be used as a make up remover, hair tamer, and a cuticle oil. Though at $48 a pop, I'll save it for my face. This .7 ml sample costs about $20.

TheBalm Mad Lash mascara: I've never tried this brand's mascara before. Though the eyeliner I just reviewed was crap, I'm still excited for this. Apparently this product delivers great volume. I'll let you know. Full size (8 mls) is $18 so this 2.5 mls sample is around $5.50. (CF)

Overall this bag is valued around $58.50. And everything was from a brand that's cruelty free. Whoop! Good job this month, Ipsy!

Ipsy October 2016 Review

Well...shit. September got away from me for a bit. Busy season helping the hubby at work and then my Aunt died. So I haven't really been up to reviewing much lately. But I'm gonna get back in the swing of things here. Expect a GIANT Morgue Drawer soon but for now...Ipsy!

For those who may not know, Ipsy is a monthly subscription service where for $10, you get 4-5 sample (sometimes full) sized beauty, skin, and hair products to try out. Check out the service here: IPSY. (I purchase this service with my own money and all opinions are my honest ones)

This month's theme is Black Magic because October. Fucking lame. Just so much wrong with that damn card but I don't want to go off on a rant about witchcraft or the general negative perception of it. Let's just ream Ipsy for the lack of usefulness and being the only subscription service with no product info/pricing.

But the bag is adorable this month. Though I prefer my 'scary' elements actually scary, when they're cute like this I can forgive them. I mean...just look at it. That zipper pull is adorable!

Anyway, let's get to the products, shall we?

Makeup Forever HD Invisible Cover Foundation: (I'm guessing I got the lightest shade - Ivory). I've heard so much about this product but it's pretty expensive and MFU is not cruelty free. However, I've swatched the foundation and it looks like a pretty dang good match. The formula is a nice light texture and I think it would look very natural on the skin (I'll have to let you know). Claims you don't even have to set it with a powder. That's kind of nice. One less step and all. They also carry a SHIT ton of shades. One ounce is $43 so this almost .2 ounce sample probably runs around $8. (NCF)

NYX Vivid Brights Liquid Eyeliner (Vivid Gunmetal): I don't see this color listed on the NYX website but I'm pretty sure it's the same price and size as they're regular vivid brights. Good pigmentation, glides on very smooth. Haven't tested the lasting power but I'm excited to! These go for $7. (CF)

Tre'Stique Matte Lip Crayon (Belize Bordeaux): I've received another color of this exact product before. While it initially feels very comfortable and doesn't dry down to painful levels, this color particularly goes on a bit patchy and it wears off unevenly. If you try to build it up, it doesn't really work very well and just slides around. The demo on their site shows the crayon being topped with a balm or gloss so I'll try that and see how it goes. There is no option on the site for JUST the crayon (it's paired with a balm/gloss for $28) so I'll just cut that in half and say this sample is $14. (CF- website states they're cruelty free but nothing about their suppliers or third party manufacturers).

Left to Right: Tre'Stique lip crayon; NYX Vivid Brights eyeliner; Makeup Forever foundation

Pur-lisse Daily Lip Nourisher: I've gotten an eye cream from this brand before and it stung like a mother fucker so I immediately threw it on the ground, stomped on it, set it on fire, then threw it away. This lip balm gives a little tingle but I don't think it's supposed to. The only thing I can think of is that the orange peel oil might be doing that but it's the last ingredient so I don't know for sure. The texture of this stuff is pretty cool - like the Malin and Goetz balm. Gel- like and clear, goes on smooth and sticks around for a while (though not as well as the M&G). Full size at .38 ounces is $16 so this .15 ounce is around $6.50 (CF and vegan, according to their website - no other CF sites list anything about this company)

Lottie London Perfectly Precise eye shadow brush: Never heard of this brand before; there's no website linked at Ipsy; can't find any info other than a web page talking about a contest and random articles. The brush is super soft but it never looks like the bristles pick up enough product until you grind it into your shadows. Have to play with it a bit more to be sure if it'll work well in the long run. Full sized and costs $15. (?)

Looks like the overall value of this bag is about $50. Not too shabby!

Ipsy August 2016 Review

For those who may not know, Ipsy is a monthly subscription service. For $10 each month, you will receive a reusable bag with 4-5 sample (sometimes full) sized beauty, skin, and hair products. Check them out for yourselves here: IPSY

(I purchase this service with my own money and all opinions are my honest ones)

This month's theme is something like Sugar Highness or some bullshit like that. I wish they'd use the card insert for more helpful information, like the products, their uses, and their costs, instead of some random theme that means absolutely nothing to anyone.

I do love this month's bag. The pastel colors are beautiful and the material of it feels nice and sturdy. KEEPER! The products are pretty cool, too.

Organic Surge Perfecting Face Polish: This is one of those exfoliators that has little grains of ground olive stone (I assume they mean the pit) to scrub away dead skin and impurities but not so much as to feel like you're using sandpaper on your face. There are also lots of good oils mixed in to help moisturize. I only put this on the back of my hand but I like the feel of it and I can really smell the lemon. Full size at 2.5 oz is $9.15 so this 1 ounce sample should go around $3.5 (CF)

IT Cosmetics No-Tug Waterproof Gel Liner: (swatch shown in picture below) IT is one of those high end brands that I'm pretty much too cheap to buy on my own (though I admit to spending $19 on a liquid eyeliner by Kat VonD and it was worth every penny). So I love that I got a sample size of their eyeliner. I've worn it a couple of times and I have to say this liner is the only one that has stayed in my waterline (or at least the edge of it) longer than any other I've tried. It stays put on the eye skin, too (lid and lower lash line). It still melts in the outer corners because my eyes just LOVE to fuck up any makeup I put on them. Full size is .017 oz for $22. This .012 sample size is about $15.50! (CF)

Sally's Box Secret Garden Masks: Aside from the sexual innuendo going on that name, I love getting face masks. Haven't tried either yet but my skin has been dry lately so these moisturizing masks will be great, I'm sure! The extra ampoule in the corner of each one provides even more moisture! Yaassss..... They're on sale right now but these full sized products normally go for $6 each. (?)

Lord and Berry Matte Lip Crayon: I got a liner from this brand before and didn't particularly care for the warm brown shade. I don't gravitate to warms colors but this is a pretty warm pink. It does look matte but it doesn't feel super dry. Lasts well, too. Full size is $20 so I'm guessing this sample is maybe half the size (can't find any product details on the L&B website) so let's say this is $10. (NCF)

Jelly Pong Pong Neapolitan Palette: And we have another trio of gold/bronze/peach tones. Hooray... Yes, I'm being a smart ass. However, these eye shadows are buttery, pigmented, and gorgeous and can be used wet or dry. I think I like the tones on these three better than the other 4-5 I've received. The only problem, for me, is there's no matte shade. I love the shininess of them but it's nice to mix in other finishes to complete a look. Otherwise, I'm in love. Full size, on the website, is .11 ounces and this 'sample' is .1 ounce. So I'm calling it full size and worth $18. (CF)

Looks to me this whole bag is worth about $59. SCORE! Aside from the Lord and Berry lip crayon (it's...okay), I love everything else, even the bag! Can't wait to see what they do next month.

Ipsy April 2016 Review

For those who may not know, Ipsy is a monthly subscription service. For $10, you will get a (sometimes) cute beauty bag with 4-5 samples, or full sized, beauty, skin, and hair products. It's a nice way to try new brands without committing to the full price tag! Check them out here: IPSY

I think from this point on I will try to remember to mark which brands are cruelty free (CF).

The theme for April is Dream On. WHHHHYYYYYYYY ARE THEY SO USELESS WITH THESE FUCKING THEMES??? The bag is kind of cute, though. The back is a bright yellow with tie-dye colors mixed in. I'm not mad at it. But the contents.....let's just break them down.

Crown Duo-Fiber Blush Brush: I always like getting brushes. I've received one or two Crown brushes before and they are awesome. So damn soft! They retail for about $24. That, right there, already covers the value of an Ipsy subscription. (CF - as far as their synthetic brushes go. Not sure how they can guarantee their suppliers of animal hair brushes are harvested cruelty free but that's what they claim).

Tarte Cosmetics LipSurgence Lip Creme: (right swatch below) I was super excited to get this. Tarte is one of those higher end brands that I've only ever purchased once with my own money (eye shadow palette that was decent). This is a generous sample size. The lip crayon is very creamy and has a nice minty scent - but it's not super strong so if you're sensitive to that, it shouldn't bother you too much. Full size is .1 ounces ($24) so this .05 sample runs about $12. And look at that color. So pretty! (CF)

Ok. That's about all I like from this bag. Let's get to the rest.

Nomad Cosmetics Eye Shadow in Desert Sands: Oh yay. Another bronze shade. Awesome. While the color is beautiful (left swatch above), feels soft, and it's a decent sample size, I'M SO FUCKING SICK OF BRONZE COLORS. Cripes. I know they want to put in colors that are more universal but shit - BRONZE IS NOT THE ONLY ONE, YOU KNOW. I can't find a price on this as it looks like the brand doesn't sell these individually but you can see the whole palette this comes from along with other palettes - which actually look pretty gorgeous and a good deal for everything you get. (CF)

Briogeo Overnight Hair Oil Treatment: While this concept is slightly intriguing, I don't look forward to the mess it will create. Since I'm not bleaching and coloring my hair right now, I don't really need this product. But I'll hang on to it just in case that changes....HAHA! Who am I kidding? I'll be so bored with my grey in about 2 months, I can feel it...Full size is 2 ounces ($28) so this sample of .3 ounces is probably around $9. (CF)

Juliette Has a Gun: It's called Not a Perfume so then what the fuck is it, JHAG? Oh, it's just a 'minimal scent', whatever the fuck that means. Personally I think it smells like algae water that passed through an isopropyl alcohol factory where an Orc grabbed it, drank it down then pissed it out onto a hobbit's head. This .16 ounce sample is about $20 (50 mls will cost you $100 and 100 mls is $135). (CF)

For the products I found pricing on, this bag is worth about $65. Pretty slick, Ipsy. Though I'm not super excited about 3 of the 5 products (#firstworldproblems, I know), I can't be too angry because they all come from companies that practice cruelty free/vegan/eco-friendly business.

See you all next month!

Ipsy February 2016 Review

For those who may not know, Ipsy is a monthly subscription. For $10 each month, you will received 4-5 samples (some full size) of beauty, skin, and hair products. It's a great way to try new brands without committing to a high price tag! Check them out at www.ipsy.com

(I purchase this each month with my own money and all opinions are my honest ones)

This month's theme is Pretty In Pink. Don't know if that's a nod to the 30th anniversary of the John Hughes' film of the same name but whatever. Still useless.

At first glance the bag had me shaking my head but I quickly fell in love with it. I have no idea why but I did. So sue me for being a girly girl.

Dr. Brandt Pore Dermabrasion exfoliator: I love exfoliators, unless they're too harsh. Haven't tried this one yet but I've heard of the brand. Not sure if I had something from them before...Anyway, a 2 ounce size goes for $58. So this 1/8 ounce values out at around $7.25. Hope it doesn't suck.

Promise Organic face lotion: I like to try different face creams and you can actually get this at CVS. Full size, 1.7 ounces, is $15. This sample is about 1/3 size so it costs around $5.

Smashbox Primer Oil: I've heard a few reviews on this. It's not so much a face primer to help your makeup last longer but more of a skin prep to help moisturize your face to get it ready for primer and makeup. I'm oily but I get dry in the winter so this could be cool. 1 ounce costs $42 so this 1/10th size sample costs about $4.

Tre'Stique Baby Blush Stick: I've gotten the eye shadow stick before which is drier than a popcorn fart and just as difficult to deal with. This blush stick is very soft, almost dries to a powder finish, but is a little tricky to blend. The color is peach with a pink undertone (though it looks pretty orange in the swatch). Very flattering. Don't know how much you get in the full size ($34) but I'll take a guess at 1/3 the size so let's say this sample is around $10.

Trust Fund Nail Polish: The color is called "I'm Kind Of a Big Deal". HA! I've received this brand before. And just like that one, this color is nice but pretty patchy. It's kind of thick so two coats will peel very easily off the nail. *shrug* This is a full size so it's worth $15.

Overall, a $41 value is pretty good. I'm happy with this one!

Ipsy October/November 2015 Reviews

Here's another double review for you! For those who don't know, Ipsy is a monthly beauty subscription service. For $10 you can 4-5 samples (sometimes deluxe sized, sometimes full) of beauty products. These can range from make up to skin care to hair products. Check them out!  (as always, I purchase this service with my own money and all opinions are my honest ones).  https://www.ipsy.com/

Let's start with October!

The theme for October was Alter Ego (whatever). Not that crazy about the bag. It looks like gold lame on the one side and black S&M vinyl on the back. 5 products came this month but I used some points to cash in on two extras.

Emite Slanted Tweezers: What needs to be said? They're tweezers. I actually needed a pair so it worked out for me but really, ipsy? Tweezers? Looking up this brand on-line, they are Swedish so I had to do a bit of conversion to get a value (read: Googled it). Apparently 200 Krona is about $22. FOR FUCKING TWEEZERS?!?

The Balm Meet Matt(e) Hughes Lipstick: (middle swatch) I've never tried the Balm lip products before and this shit is for real. Extremely long lasting (I ate a meal and some snacks and this stuff still stayed on), smells nice and minty, and it NOT drying at all. It does get really sticky as it dries down but the color doesn't peel or pull off. Does that make sense? Though I'm not crazy about the color - it's a little too warm for me - I'd be willing to spend $17 on a full size. This sample goes for around $3.50

Mica Beauty Cream Eyeshadow: (right swatch) I think I have other stuff from Mica. This cream shadow is a gorgeous gold/bronze shade (though this color is getting very tiresome from Ipsy). It's very pigmented and swatches nicely. Not patchy. I have no idea how it looks on the eyes because I can barely remove it from the back of my hand after 30 minutes of scrubbing with a makeup wipe. I'll need to get an oil based removed to see if that helps. Otherwise, I may never wear it, which would be a shame because it is pretty. It's an exclusive product for Ipsy so I couldn't find it on their site. Their regular mineral eye shadows are a similar weight and got for $15.

Lavanilla Laboratories Pure Vanilla Rollerball: I've reviews a lotion from these folks before and I didn't like the scent. It was way too heavy and artificial. That said, this roller ball perfume is everything I want in a vanilla scent! It's perfection in a tiny bottle! This mini size goes fro $12. I might consider purchasing the larger size at $19 (it's double the amount of the mini) but since I don't go through perfume all that fast I'd have to think on it. 

Ayres Hand Cream: I have a few other hand creams to work through so I haven't opened this one yet. The full size goes for $12.50 (1.4 ounces) so this .7 ounce bottle is about $6.25.

So this whole bag's value goes for almost $59. I'd say that's a steal, even if $22 of it goes for fucking tweezers. Lame.

The extras I got are:

Pixi Eyebrow Trio: It's a little baby palette of powders for brows. The highlight shade didn't swatch at all. The two brown shades take a lot of back and forth to get the damn color to show up. So if you want just a hint of color in your brows, something soft, this could work. But the pigmentation is so shitty I'm not sure it's even worth it. Definitely not worth $6 and not worth the points I wasted on it.

Befine Cucumber Mask: I can't even remember if I've tried this yet. I want to say yes because I wanted to know if the cucumber smell was crazy. And I don't believe it was. Full size (4 ouces) goes for $25 so this 1 ounce sample is about $6.

WHEW! Now let's get on to November!

Theme is Beauty Blast. Who knows? The bag is totally cute and colorful though the materials is similar to a vinyl pool toy. But I'm already over it.

Pantene Blowout Extend Dry Shampoo: I haven't tried this one yet as I have another can of Batiste to work through. But I'm a little nervous. My stylist (current and ones in the past) have warned me off Pantene shampoo products before so I'm not too eager to crack this baby open. Full size goes for $5-7 so this sample is probably around $2.

Tre'Stique Mini Matte Lip Crayon: I got the color Chili Red and I first I thought it was an obnoxious bright cherry color but it's a little deeper on my lips. It's definitely got a blue base so it works out for my skin tone. It feels like nothing is on your lips. Not drying at all and it lasts forever! I forgot I had the stuff on and it lasted through most of the day which included eating at least one meal and some snacks. I can't find the matte crayon alone (it's only paired with a gloss stick) and goes for $28. BUT you can purchase 3 mini crayons for $25 so I'd put this one mini's value at around $8.

Smashbox Full Exposure Mascara: I don't normally buy a lot of high-end makeup. But if something is really good, I seriously consider it. I got a sample of this and while I don't agree it adds volume at all, it does a beautiful job of separating and lengthening my lashes beautifully! I think it's the natural bristle brush - those are my favorite. Not sure if I'd spend $20 on a full size though. I don't know how much is in a full size but I'm guessing this sample of 3 ml is product 1/4 of a regular tube so figure on $5 value.

Absolute NY Nano Liner: I do love a good liquid liner pen. Though they have a tendency to dry out faster than the brush/bottle combos, they are a bit easier to use. I've only swatched this on my hand but it went on smoothly and you can make the line thin or thick. I believe this is full size which goes for $10.

Jelly Pong Pong Liquid Gossamer: I've heard of this brand but never tried it before. This is a liquid/cream product that you're supposed to use all over your face for a luminous look. I can't do that because my pores are as big as New Jersey so this kind of product just accentuates that. HOWEVER, it would make an awesome highlight and I'm kind of addicted to highlighters right now. The color is a gorgeous rose champagne and it doesn't look like there's a lot of chunky glitter in it. I don't mind a little but too much or too big comes off like little kid makeup. This is a full size tube and it goes for $23.

Overall I'm super happy with this month. It's value is probably just under $50 so even though last month seemed to have more value, I like the products in November's bag much better!

August Ipsy Bag - Review

Sorry I didn’t post a review for the July Ipsy bag. I was still really struggling with our dog’s death and didn’t feel the relevance of talking about make up. Don’t get me wrong. I love to get these things and talk about them but it just seemed so...frivolous last month. I’m still grieving over my boy and probably will be for a long time but I know I can’t stay in that sad hole forever or I’ll never be able to leave.

So slowly but surely I’m putting my fingers back to the keyboard to write (anything), working conventions, participating in life again. Besides, the new couch we got a few months ago is really starting to make my ass sore.

My August Ipsy bag arrived a few days ago. The theme is Prep School (who really cares? they should have the product info on the card instead of creating an irrelevant theme but whatevs) and though the bag is hideous - I’m not a houndstooth print kinda gal - the items inside are pretty sweet.

Yeah, this isn’t some pervy old man fantasy of schools girls at all.

Eco-Beauty Night Cream: I’ve used an Eco-Beauty face wash before (from another Ipsy bag). I loved that product so I have high hopes for this one. As soon as I work my way through a sample of the Neutrogena Hydro Gel cream, I’ll give this a shot! Sample is .5 fl oz (full size is 1.7 fl ounces for $40) which is probably around $13.

Albertini International Divine Skin Hydrator: Never heard of this but it’s an in-shower moisturizer. I’m excited to try it but I’m going to have to warn the hubby when I use it because it comes with a warning that it may make tub and shower surfaces slippery. Maybe I need to get some adhesive ducks...(Big Bang fans know what I mean). Sample is 1 ounce (full size is 9 ounces at $16) so this is about $1.75.

Doll 10 Beauty Hydrogel Cream Blush (Flirt): I do love me some cream blush. Most of them are super easy to blend and they are great for those low make-up days. Just slap some on and your days of being mistaken for one of the undead is over. At least for a few hours. This color is a soft deep peach shade. I can pull off the peach. But this is awfully close to orange/coral so a light hand is needed. I’ve worn it once already and it goes on so smooth and it looks like a natural flush of color. I’ve never heard of the brand but I’m impressed so far. This size is 3.15 grams (full size is 4 grams for $16) so I’d guess this is just about the same price, maybe $15.

Noyah All Natural Lipstick (Desert Rose) and Lord & Berry Ultimate Lipliner (Nude): Never heard of Noyah but I have heard of Lord & Berry. Never tried either. The lipstick (left swatch) looks a lot more like Barbie Pink on my lips but I like that it’s all natural, never tested on animals, and synthetic free. It feels creamy on first application but it does get a little dry. Not like a full matte but more of a satin finish. In case you can’t see the deets in the photo there is a promo code for this brand (15% off PLUS a free lip balm). Go to noyah.com and use code noyahROSES. Why the hell not, right? This sample is .04 ounces (full size, with much cuter packaging, is .16 ounces for $18) so what I got is about $4.50.

The lipliner will never be nude in my universe but it’s really creamy and goes on so smooth. It claims to be waterproof, highly blendable, and contains waterlily extracts and macadamia oil. I’m willing to play around with it (maybe I can dip back into that 90s look of super dark lip liner and frosty light lipstick....maybe not). Sample is .03 ounces (can’t find the full size amount on-line but they’re $18) so perhaps the sample is $12.

Overall I guesstimate this bag to be worth about $46 so for the $10 monthly cost, I made out like a bandit. All of these products will be used, some probably more than others, but I’m very happy with this month’s offerings!