PDs, MEHs, and GFYs

With the new year, I'm hoping to get on a more regimented schedule with this column. It seems like I post these anywhere from every month and a half to every three. That's a little too random. So I think I might try to do this every two months which should give me enough time to find stuff that I love or want to set on fire.

So here we go with the first 2016 list! (I'm trying to use a professional styled camera for these pics now and I think it's obvious I need to practice. I still don't know what all the buttons do or how to change the settings so excuse the crappy focus on these until I can get my shit together)

Panty Droppers (PDs)

Revlon Ultra HD Matte Cream Lip Color: These just came out a month or so ago in the ever reaching trend of liquid to matte lipsticks. And while the few I've tried have just completely SUCKED ASS, I love this one. Probably because it doesn't full dry down to a complete matte. It stays a bit creamy on the lips and will transfer - to your coffee cup, donut, the delivery man - so keep that in mind. You can blot with a tissue and that will make it look more matte. But if you're like me and can't stand the Saraha Desert on your mouth, you'll love these. The colors are gorgeous, the formula feels like a whipped gel, and I actually like the fruity smell. They run anywhere from $7-$9, depending on where you go. Got my at Walgreens. The colors I have (from bottom to top): Seduction, Devotion, Addiction. 

Chips Ahoy Chocolate Chip Cookies with Oreo Cream Filling: You read that right. Imagine a soft baked Chips Ahoy cookie. Now picture a thin layer of Oreo filling right in the middle. Can you see it? It's glorious, isn't it? I know it sounds like it would be too sweet. Don't get me wrong - it is very sweet. But in no way is it overpowering or gag inducing. It's a beautiful tasty creation.

YSL Touche Elcat Concealer/Brightener: I got 3 little samples on a promotional card from a Sephora order, I think. The first two were for fair skin and the third for a medium complexion. Obviously the third was too dark but the first two were gorgeous. No. 1 (bottom right of swatches) has a nice peach tone to it so it covers dark circles well. No. 2 (middle right) worked great as a non-shimmery highlighter and concealer. Unfortunately this stuff is $42 a pop so I don't think I'll be purchasing some any time soon.

Colourpop Gel Liner: Colourpop is mostly a huge hit for me, with just a few misses (I'll do a Colourpop centric review in a bit). And their gel liners just came out a little while ago so I thought I'd give them a shot. Awesome stuff! I tried it the first time without priming or powdering my lids. And that shit lasted a good 8-10 hours before it started to fade. That's fucking crazy! Especially with my super oily lids. It does dry pretty quick so it's difficult to go back and fix any mistakes. But it's totally worth $6! The color is called Workout.

MEHs

Dermalogica Multivitamin Power Serum: I can only give this a meh rating because it totally broke me out. Though it smelled really nice and it felt very silky going on the skin, it's just not worth it if it gives me pizza face. Oh well. I'm sure I'll get over it and its $66 price tag soon enough...okay, I'm over it.

Kiss of Cherry lip balm (Nivea): I love the Kiss of Moisture balms from Nivea but like the one with SPF, the Cherry one dries my lips like a mo-fo. I don't know if the staining color that's the culprit or what but I couldn't even finish the tube. It smells fantastic and feels great at first so it could just be my sensitive ass (that's where it goes, right?). You can find this for $2-$3.

Almay Get Up and Grow Mascara: I can't remember if I put this stuff in another list but if I did and gave it any higher rating than MEH, I was an idiot. It does give fantastic volume and my lashes felt soft, never crunchy. But it ended up smudging on both my upper and lower lids. Booooo. It retails for around $7-$9.

GFYs (Go Fuck Yourselves)

Carol's Daughter Monoi Hairspray: I don't know who the fuck Carol or her daughter are but their hairspray is crap. The smell is gag inducing so I can't even use enough of it to get an idea of its usefulness. The can it came in leaks a bit, too. Ugh. And it costs $22? NOT.

Pur-lisse Eye Serum: I believe I just talked about this in my Ipsy bag review. This crap is awful. It burns my skin. It's not like the tissues of the under eye are already sensitive or anything. Ass hats. $65 price tag? What a fucking joke.

(I guess I hated the last three items on this list so much that I threw them away already)

City Color Be Bold Mascara: I've gotten this brand a few times in Ipsy and most of it is good. But this stuff sucks. It's gloppy, smudgy, clumpy, and all around awful. It doesn't do much for either volume or length. I'd expect a little better for $6.

Garnier Shine Control Cleansing Gel (charcoal): I think I got this after I realized I didn't want to buy the Olay scrubby wash anymore. This stuff smells so bad and it totally broke me out. This runs around $8.

Derma e Anti Wrinkle Glycolic Scrub: I was so sad about this one. I have a couple other Derma e products that are wonderful. But this smelled so strongly like old fashioned Ivory soap and it was very rough on the skin. And I'm such a delicate fucking flower, apparently, that it broke me out, too.

That's it for now, kiddies. I'll (hopefully) be back in two months with some more fun!

PDs, GFYs, and MEHs - September 2015 Edition

Well, August kind of got away from me so I'll be combining it with September for this list of Panty Droppers, Go Fuck Yourselves, and Mehs. 

First, let's get to the good stuff. (I didn't take pics of everything in each category - just the stuff that was close at hand!)

For my beauty PD products, I've got these three pictured above. Almay Smart Shade CC cream, the Rimmel Fix & Perfect face primer, and the Neutrogena Hydro gel. I love the CC cream because it's a nice shade match for me and it's not heavy or full coverage (which I prefer). I do feel like my natural oiliness comes through but I don't look greasy, does that make sense? The Rimmel primer is awesome. It looks and feels like a light lotion but it really sinks into the skin and it doesn't feel like I'm wearing anything (on my face, pervs). The Hydro gel was a sample and it smelled awesome! It worked really well, too, so I'm hoping when I get the full size, it won't disappoint me like the Hada Labo gel did.

For food, I've got two things for you:

Annie's Cheddar Bunnies and Animal Crackers. I've only tried the snack products from this company. The extra cheesy cheddar bunnies are better than the regular and the animal crackers are wonderful. They kind of taste like the original animal crackers we all grew up on (us old people, anyway) but they are much more dense. I believe all of their products are natural, possibly organic (don't quote me) and their business practices aim for social responsibility. I've found these at Target, Meijers, and Value Center. You've got to try some! www.annies.com

Oreo Pumpkin Spice: I know, I know. Everything is turning up pumpkin spice right now because Fall. I, personally, am not a freak about it. I don't run out and get anything and everything in this scent or flavor (most pumpkin candles make me barf and I don't need my coffee to taste like a gourd). HOWEVER, Oreos are some of my favorite cookies and when I saw these, I had to try them. I believe they came out last year but the are limited edition each fall. AND THEY ARE AMAZEBALLS! If you like pumpkin pie, you'll like these.

The last thing is not a product but a technique. I'm probably the last one to jump on this bandwagon but from watching Emily Noel on YouTube (emilynoel83), I discovered how awesome it is to apply cream blush with a stippling brush. It makes it so much easier to blend out the product that you just can't get with your fingers. Who knew? (everyone besides me, I'm sure)

Now for the Go Fuck Yourselves:

Beauty and Hair was all about the uselessness these past months. For hair: the Not Your Mother's Dry Shampoo (good thing because I hate to think your mom sucks ass) and the Ulta brand Smooth and Protect shampoo/conditioner. I've tried multiple brands of dry shampoo. I love Batiste but the smell can be cloying so I wanted to see if I could find something just as good. Nooooope. NYM's dry shampoo was completely useless, unless I sprayed on half a can which mostly went straight to my lungs. The Ulta shampoo and conditioner did nothing to smooth or protect my hair. It dried it out even more and if I were transformed into a muppet, I'd be the frizz monster who lives with the dust bunnies and spare change under your couch.

The makeup that seriously disappointed me was the Catrice liquid eyeliner and Colour Pop's ultra matte liquid lipstick. I wanted to try the Catrice brand because Keerstin on YouTube (ItsKeerstin) talked about it a lot. Before Ulta brought it into their stores/on-line, you could only get in Europe. So I was excited to try a few things once they got stateside. This eyeliner was terrible. It took forever to dry and even if I DIDN'T open my eyes, or move or breathe in any way, it still smudged. Which is interesting because when I tried to take it off, it was near impossible! What the fuck, Catrice?

The ColourPop matte liquid lipsticks make me mad. I love the brand (I have several lippie stix, blushes, and highlighters that I love) so when these mattes came out, I was super excited. Now I just want to punch someone. The colors are nice but the formula is so drying as to be painful. They set within seconds so don't fuck up. And if it looks patchy, too fucking bad because if you put on a second layer, it clumps together or just wipes off the original application. Then when you WANT to take them off, you basically need a jackhammer and some napalm. They. Are. Awful. I want to apologize to my friend, MontiLee, for giving her the pink color I ordered (it didn't look right on me but I thought she might enjoy it). I'm so so so sorry.

And finally, the MEHs.

I think most of my Meh's work well for other people but just not for me. Which is why they are just okay.

Three primers I tried: Benefit's Porefessional; Smashbox Photo Finish; and Catrice Prime & Fine. I'm pretty sure the Porefessional and Prime & Fine broke me out (gods dammit, Catrice!). The Smashbox is a silicone primer and with my oily skin, it doesn't work. It also balls up when I put the Almay CC over it so...no.

The Maybelline Lash sensational mascara (in the pink tube) was just so wet and gloppy. Most people say to just give it time to dry out a bit, but mine never got there. I'll work with shadows and maybe blushes but not mascara. That's one thing that needs to work as is straight out of the tube.

I also got a body wash from Bath & Body Works in a Honey Lavender scent. It's a good shower gel but the scent leaves a lot to be desired. I don't get much lavender from it and the honey smells weird. I've only got a little bit left so once that's done I'm getting back to my Jasmine Vanilla!!

That's it for this edition. Hopefully I'll get back to monthly reviews on this stuff! But let's not count on that just yet. Busy season at the hubby's store is in full swing and I help out when he needs me. I may not be back until November...