Safiya Nygaard x Colourpop Lipstick Collection Review

Whew, that’s a title, eh?

There are few times in life that I see a promo for something, or in this case, a collaboration, that you can pre-order OR get early notification on the sale date, that I will jump on that bitch faster than you can say “YOU DON’T NEED ANY MORE MAKEUP”. And when one of my favorite YouTubers does a collaboration with an awesome makeup company to create a set of lipsticks, well, this lipstick whore couldn’t open her…wallet fast enough.

In case you don’t know who Safiya is, here’s a link to her channel: SAFIYA NYGAARD (sah-FEE-ah NIGH-guard). She’s not a beauty ‘guru’ or a makeup specific channel or…well, it’s hard to say what she does because her videos cover a gamut of topics: ASMR, bad makeup science, fashion through the decades, food adventures, and on and on and on. So just do yourself a favor and check out her content.

HER VIDEOS, YOU PERVS.

In case you don’t know who or what Colourpop is….is it your first time here, my friend? CP started out as a small, indie makeup company that made lippie stix and super shock eye shadow singles. Now it’s a worldwide sensation. And most of the products available are under $15 (not counting bundles, packs, full eye shadow palettes, vaults, or that kind of thing). Here’s a link to the CP site so you can check them out for yourself: COLOURPOP

Now that we got all that business out of the way, let’s get down…to, uh, business. Safiya and CP created a line of 6 different lipsticks, the colors of which came about by Safiya’s Bad Makeup Science videos (which are entertaining AND educational). What’s extra awesome about this collection is Safiya included her bat aesthetic to the box they come in, the outer packaging of the lipstick, and the bullet of lipstick itself. You’ll see in the photos below.

I mean, come on. Look at that packaging. I SAID LOOK AT IT! Absolutely gorgeous. I much prefer something like this over fake jewel encrusted, covered in bows, froo-froo crap.

In this collection, you get four lipsticks in the Creme Lux formula and two in the Matte Lux formula. The four cremes are (top to bottom): Bikini Bottom, Mrs. Norris, Berry Me in Lipsticks, and Fred. I love that the packaging has a band of color that matches the lipstick bullet inside.

The two Matte Lux colors are (top and bottom): Screamers and Brucie.

And here some hand swatches of each.

Bikini Bottom is a pinkie-beige nude.

Mrs. Norris is greige-y brown.

Berry Me in Lipsticks is a mauve-berry tone.

Fred is a full bodied red with a bunch of different undertones (hence the Frankenstein Red name - Fred, get it?)

Screamers is a deep black-burgundy.

Brucie is sharky blue-green.

The Creme Lux formulas are divine. So comfortable, pigmented, easy to apply. They last longer than I thought they would - not through heavy eating, but let’s be real here.

The Matte Lux formulas are good. Not drying in the least, but they are a tad bit streakier than the cremes. That’s to be expected, though, because they’re matte, not creamy. They won’t glide on as well, and the color has a tendency to pick up on itself if you try to layer it or moosh your lips together. But they’re gorgeous and comfortable.

Below are the swatches of each color on my lips. Keep in mind, if your lips are more or less pigmented than mine, and your skin is a different color, these will most definitely look different on you.

I’m already a big fan of Colourpop’s makeup, particularly their lipstick formulas. Add in Safiya and her bats, and this collection is pretty fucking rad. If you’ve never tried anything from Colourpop and aren’t sure where to start, this is a good jumping off point. The colors are pretty universal (though Brucie is more for the experimental type, and I love ‘weird’ colored lip products) so what are you waiting for??

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PDs, MEHs, and GFYs June 2019

Surprisingly this month, I have fewer duds than goodies. Huh. Not sure I like this turn of events…Anyway, here are some products I’ve really enjoyed, felt indifferent toward, or just plain hated. Hope you like it!

(For those of you who are new here, PD - Panty Droppers; MEH - meh; GFY - Go Fuck Yourself)

PDs

Makeup Geek Gel Liner in Poison: This was the first red gel eyeliner I ever used. I had this thing for YEARS and it wouldn’t dry out! Great color, did not budge, didn’t make my eyes look like I was sick, either. Red and pinks can do that… It did finally dry up, though, so it was too difficult to use. Highly recommend this product! But…it looks like MG doesn’t make gel liners anymore. GAH!

Catrice Prime and Fine Smoothing Primer: I loved this primer. It really smooths out the appearance of my Nebraska-sized pores, and the texture is almost like a mousse. Feels great on the skin, more like a moisturizer.

Colourpop Lip Gloss in Fairy Floss: My absolute favorite nude gloss ever. Unfortunately, after years of faithful service, it now tingles when I put it on. That’s less than optimal, so I gotta toss it. I’ve already ordered a replacement.

MEH

NYX Worth the Hype Mascara: It’s not. It does make the lashes look darker, but more natural and not a lot of volume. I don’t mind that, but this doesn’t do what it says.

Colourpop Brow Boss Gel: I don’t really get this product. It’s white and feels like lotion, which doesn’t really do much for keeping rogue brow hairs in place. But because it’s not tinted, it’s less messy to work with, which is nice.

Bobbi Brown Illuminating Moisture Balm: I love the glow this stuff gives - so pretty. But the smell is horrendous! Very much like chemicals and plastic. UGH.

Katy Perry x Covergirl Katy Kat Lip Gloss in Cobalt Kitty: I originally posted about this a while ago because I thought it was such a fun color. And it is! But it’s streaky and difficult to work with. Very patchy, low pigment, and wearing it over a lip liner or another lip product doesn’t help.

GFY

ELF Velvet Touch Eye Shadow in Island Breeze: I got this little palette free with an order from ELF. And now I know why. They probably can’t get rid of these fast enough. The colors look pretty but they pigment is just not there. You can’t build them up and what goes on the lids does NOT last. The high moisture content is disgusting. The plastic package had smears of something wet on it - I’m hoping just the water or oils from the shadows themselves. They feel mushy and the peach shade was very wet. Blech.

Colourpop Jelly Much Shadow in Hallucinogenius: I really liked this stuff at first. It was squishy, like a jelly, but the color and sparkle were so pretty. But I only used this stuff two or three times, and I made sure the little pot was closed tightly after every use. But this stuff is dry and hard now, and all I get is a little sparkle on my finger. WHAT THE FUCK?

That’s it for this month. See you guys down the road!

PDs, MEHs, and GFYs March 2019

Welcome to the first Likes/Dislikes post of 2019! For anyone new, this is a post where I sing the praises, or bitch like a curmudgeonly old biddy, about products I’ve tried over the past few months. The categories are: Panty Droppers, Mehs, and Go Fuck Yourselves.

PDs

The Potion Cabinet Shower Gel (Witch’s Cold Brew): This is an Etsy story that offers bath products, collectibles, and more. This scent is listed as: a warm cup of espresso, cocoa bean, steamed milk and vanilla chai topped with whipped cream and a touch of rum. Mostly, I only smelled the vanilla and rum, maybe a little bit of the cocoa. IT WAS HEAVENLY. I like the gel itself - leaves my skin soft and the scent doesn’t linger, which I prefer.

Merchant of Gallifry Roll-on Fragrance: Another Etsy store (yes, I’m addicted) but it looks like they don’t make perfumes anymore. There is a bunch of scented stuff, though. Loved this perfume. I believe the notes were mango and rose but I couldn’t necessarily pick out either. They melded together wonderfully for a very unique scent.

Milani Retouch and Erase Light-Lifting Concealer: I haven’t used this up, but it’s really old, and I think it’s starting to turn. It’s a fantastic concealer for me. My under eyes are much dryer now than when I was younger, and this is one of the only concealers that doesn’t look like total shit on me. Will be repurchasing.

Carol’s Daughter Frappe Body Lotion (Almond Cookie): I’ve used Carol’s Daughter’s hair products before (which SUCK ASS) so I almost didn’t get this. I needed a body lotion that worked better than what I already had (see the MEHs section below) and the scent on this is fantastic! Smells like straight up, fresh baked almond cookies. And the lotion is nice and thick, but absorbs quickly and lasts a long time. Highly recommend!!

MEHs

PUR Fully Charged Magnetic Mascara: This does give good volume, but no length, so my lashes look stubby. It’s a great layering mascara, though! Not sure how it’s anti-aging…what the fuck? Who believes that kind of shit?

Flower Beauty Light Illusion Full Coverage Concealer: While this is a good shade (it’s just about the same color as my skin so it blends in well) and it’s lightweight, it’s definitely not full coverage. It’s also not crease-proof, looks SUPER dry under my eyes and anywhere I use it to cover blemishes or spots.

Everyone Body Lotion (Lavender & Aloe): While the scent on this is really nice (great to use before bedtime,) it doesn’t seem to really moisturize my skin. Absorbs fast - or maybe it just poofs off into the ether - because my skin doesn’t fell any different after using it. It also says you can use it for face, hands, and body. Um…no. No, you can’t. This is NOT good for the face.

GFYs

Colourpop BFF Mascara: Now, anyone who’s been here a while, knows I love Colourpop. I did a whole review on a bunch of products HERE. So when they came out with mascaras, I was pumped. I got a red and black one (so far, I don’t know of any other brand that makes a red mascara.) I can only speak to the red for this review because I tried that and REFUSE TO EVEN LOOK AT THE BLACK. This shit fucked up my eyes for two days. They itched, swelled up (not to the point of impairing my vision, though), and produced excessive amounts of goop. Fucking what the fuck, Colourpop? People were reviewing this like it was the Second Cumming of Christ, and even if it wasn’t for my bad reaction, the mascara itself is pretty lame. Doesn’t volumize or lengthen or ANYTHING. Fucking useless shite.

Joah Eye Scream Volume & Lengthening Mascara: I’ve only tried a couple of products from Joah (lipstick, eyebrow pencil, and this - I think.) It’s a hit and miss brand, but this stuff was HORRIBLE. It’s a fiber mascara that does ABSOLUTELY NOTHING for the lashes. However, it DOES get onto your eyeballs and poke the fucking shit out of them. Eye Scream is a pretty accurate description. So…there’s that. Fuck you, Joah.

That’s it for this (what I hope will be) quarterly report of awesome and suckage. See you next time!